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Monthly Archives: November 2012

Someone Let ‘Puter Out Again?

The Gormogons Posted on November 30, 2012 by GorTApril 6, 2014

Our apologies folks, apparently Dat Ho or Sleestak let ‘Puter roam free past the Leapin’ Peacock and he ended up on a four day bender.  Apparently somewhere around the 47th hour, he was on Mars trying to get the rover … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter, Get Your Ass to Mars, Gormogonica, Humor

Chicago’s Gun Laws Make Chicago Safe. No, Wait.

The Gormogons Posted on November 30, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Not all the news is bad, you know. Just as conservatives bemoan the potential loss of many of their social arguments, they are decisively and quickly winning one of their most popular: legalized firearms. A couple of Supreme Court victories … Continue reading →

Posted in Chicago, Chicago Political Machine, Firearms, Gang Violence, Guns, Illinois, Quinn the Eskimo, Shooting

What’s the Plan? Part Deux

The Gormogons Posted on November 30, 2012 by GorTApril 6, 2014

In this earlier post, I raised some of the issues regarding this “fiscal cliff” that the country is facing and that leads most major new outlet’s coverage these days.  In this post, let me outline a few answers and issues … Continue reading →

Posted in Boomers Are To Blame, Federal Budget, Government spending, Math class is hard, Stupidity

How to Stop a Nightmare

The Gormogons Posted on November 30, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

For those of you who love cute animal videos (The Czar), or nightmares (The Czar) one of Dr. J.’s chums forwarded this to him: Dr. J.

Continue reading →
Posted in Kittens, The Czar

What’s the Plan?

The Gormogons Posted on November 29, 2012 by GorTApril 6, 2014

Sigh.  How to begin?  Does the general public not see what is going on with the “fiscal cliff” and the various posturing going on? The GOP has acknowledged that they are open for negotiations that would include additional tax-based revenue*.  … Continue reading →

Posted in Democrats, Economics, The Obama Amateur Hour

Louisiana Teachers’ Unions Stand Up For Educational Segregation

The Gormogons Posted on November 29, 2012 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

Louisiana’s Gov. Bobby Jindal and itslegislature provided their state’s children education vouchers, freeing poor children from the invisible but lifelong shacklesof a “separate but equal” education just assurely as the Supreme Court did decadesearlier in Brown v. Board of Education. Louisiana recently … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Good Times' Racist Principle, Dirty Liberals, Education, Evil, Racism, Stupid People, Stupid Politicians, Teacher Unions, The White Devils, Unions

Dr. J. likes French Fries

The Gormogons Posted on November 29, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Dr. J. really needs to get back to work. McDonald’s fries went downhill when they moved to Canola Oil That being said, he loves French Fries. Mrs. Dr. J. prefers he order the fruit kebab poolside at New Atlantis Country … Continue reading →

Posted in French Fries, Mrs. Dr. J., New Atlantis, Philadelphia

First Aid – Gormogon Style

The Gormogons Posted on November 29, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Our friend Fred Woodbridge (@fwoodbridge) inquired as to if your Gormogons could recommend a first aid kit. Before Dr. J. could get cracking, The Czar penned this interoffice memo: Here is what the Czar does.  He goes to Wal-Mart or … Continue reading →

Posted in Dr. J., First Aid, Health care, The Czar of Muscovy

Time Man-Of-The-Year

The Gormogons Posted on November 29, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

She has Dr. J.’s vote. Apparently our friends at Time Magazine (remember when that was a relevant news organ?) nominated Dr. J.’s favorite Jesuit educated law student, Sandra Fluke. Other nominees include the inaugural participation trophy winner, Vice President Joe Biden, … Continue reading →

Posted in 1984, Barack Obama, Julia, Peanuts, Progressives, Sandra Fluke, Time Man of the Year

A National Lottery? Are You That Stupid About Money?

The Gormogons Posted on November 29, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Thanks to our good graces here at Castle Gormogon, two winners of the almost $600 million dollar Powerball game are out there somewhere. And already this morning, the Czar’s jaws dropped to see not one but two (possibly three) media … Continue reading →

Posted in Government spending, Main Stream Media, Media, Stupid People, Stupidity

Angus Jones Is More Right Than He Thinks

The Gormogons Posted on November 28, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Not-so-young actor Angus Jones, sub-star of the sub-par Two and a Half Men, plays the half-man in the series title. Ironically, though, that might pass to perpetual wannabe Ashton Kutcher who, quite frankly, is not going to be playing Iago … Continue reading →

Posted in O tempora O mores, Sex, Television

Foreign Policy Begins At Home

The Gormogons Posted on November 27, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Dr. J. would like to follow up on The Czar’s outstanding commentaries about Europe and Syria. Regarding Europe, the ‘One World Government Utopians’ would be the first to tell you that we are destined to be a united world with … Continue reading →

Posted in Babylon 5, China, Energy, Mars, Star Trek, Syria, The Czar of Muscovy, Turkey

Now With EVEN MORE Syria!

The Gormogons Posted on November 27, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Ah, the glorious arrival of Winter is imminent, when we have had so many days of below-freezing weather that the weeds and dandelions on the dacha lawn have all died leaving a glorious expanse of green grass that looks like … Continue reading →

Posted in Iran, Island Dweller, Mailbag, Syria

Obama 2016

The Gormogons Posted on November 27, 2012 by GorTApril 6, 2014

GorT had a wonderful Thanksgiving (minus I-freaking-95 from Richmond to DC on Saturday evening) and with a little downtime and unwinding on Friday evening, I watched Obama 2016, the movie, with my in-laws.      It has an interesting premise … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, This movie really sucks

Not The Czar’s Christmas Lights…

The Gormogons Posted on November 26, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Volgi’s…maybe… Dr. J.

Continue reading →
Posted in Gangnam Style, Lightbulbs, Merry Christmas, The Czar of Muscovy, Volgi (pronounced Volgi)

Democrats’ Fiscal Cliff Claims And Plans Fail To Survive Contact With Facts, Math

The Gormogons Posted on November 26, 2012 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

Let’s review a bit of history. Does anyone in the media recall what gave rise to the fiscal cliff? Anyone? Anyone at all? Apparently not.    To be fair, ‘Puter shouldn’t judge the Washington press corps for its faulty recollection of … Continue reading →

Posted in Democrats, Economic policy, Economics, Fiscal Crisis, Gubbamint, Main Stream Media, Math class is hard, Simpsons, Stupid People, Stupid Politicians, Tax Increase, Taxes, Welfare

Advice on Syria: Stay Out

The Gormogons Posted on November 26, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Strange as it may seem, the Czar is inclined to agree today with both Libertarians and Democrats alike, and confess something that many Republican conservatives probably also feel. We need, for as long as possible, to stay the hell out … Continue reading →

Posted in al-Qâ’ida, Foreign Policy, Libya, Syria, What is to be done?

You Can’t Dam History

The Gormogons Posted on November 25, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

When you are born in 1267, as the Czar was, you see Europe a little differently. Europe, circa 2230. Modern Americans tend to see Europe as either a wonderful playground, imperfectly balanced between foolish efficiency and brilliant eccentricity, or as … Continue reading →

Posted in Europe, History

Catching Up With Our Readers

The Gormogons Posted on November 24, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Dunno if it was the holiday or the travels, but the Czar got a little behind in his mail. Not sure whose behind it was, though. It was pretty bloody. First, in order of appearance, is Nightfly, who confesses: O … Continue reading →

Posted in Gormogonica, Mailbag, The ’70s—Nadir of American History

Word of the Day…

The Gormogons Posted on November 23, 2012 by The MandarinApril 6, 2014

Your Mandarin was introduced to a new word today: Ineptocracy – (in-ep-toc’-ra-cy) : A system of government where the least capable to lead are elected by the least capable of producing, and where members of society least likely to sustain … Continue reading →

Posted in Dirty Liberals, John Galt, Liberal Idiots, Obama Administration, Progressives

Turkey, it’s what’s for dinner

The Gormogons Posted on November 22, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Happy Thanksgiving from your Gormogon Overlords! Rather than gather in the castle feast hall, we travel to points hither and yon to break bread with family. Nevertheless, it is wondered It is often wondered what the Gormogons make for Thanksgiving Dinner: Volgi: … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter ain't always right, Dr. J., GorT, Thanksgiving, The Czar of Muscovy, The Inscrutable Mandarin, Volgi (pronounced Volgi)

GOP Reform VII: Overpowering Narratives

The Gormogons Posted on November 22, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Part Seven of Seven Click here for Part Six: Media Matters, Indeed The Obama re-election is not the catastrophe; it’s only the symptom. Conservatives are losing the cultural war, and there is no reason this can’t be reversed. And quickly, … Continue reading →

Posted in Conservatism, Democrats, History, Liberals, Meme, Popular Culture, Republicans, Revisionist History, Social Media

Love and Rockets

The Gormogons Posted on November 21, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Dr. J., as you, our gentle readers, know, is an Israel fan-boy, and as such has tremendous sympathy for the citizens of Israel as they are being bombarded by Palestinian terrorists on a daily basis. He stumbled upon this website which … Continue reading →

Posted in Israel, Missile defense, Palestine

GOP Reform VI: Media Matters, Indeed

The Gormogons Posted on November 21, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Part Six of Seven Click here for Part Five: Are Demographics Destiny? The media is out to destroy Republicans. And the time for peaceful negotiation is over.Long-time readers know of the Czar’s obsessive hatred with news media. Whether it’s the … Continue reading →

Posted in Conservatism, Democrats, Liberals, Main Stream Media, Media, Media Bias, Republicans, Social Media

Re: Coexist

The Gormogons Posted on November 21, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia upon the death of … Continue reading →

Posted in Gormogon Infighting

Coexist…

The Gormogons Posted on November 20, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

That is all… Dr. J.

Continue reading →
Posted in Babylon 5, Death Star, Doctor Who, Firefly, Star Trek, Star Wars

And Twas In A Film

The Gormogons Posted on November 20, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

‘Puter has been waddling around the Castle the last couple of days humming and singing a bizarre song to himself. When we asked, he denied doing anything at first, and then claimed he didn’t know what song it was. Like … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter ain't always right

GOP Reform V: Are Demographics Destiny?

The Gormogons Posted on November 20, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Part Five of Seven Click here for Part Four: Get Some Class Do Republicans need to court Latinos? Or is this yet another liberal set up? Maybe it isn’t Hispanic votes we need; maybe it’s everyone’s.Did you hear that America … Continue reading →

Posted in Conservatism, Democrats, Demographics, Hispanics, Liberals, Republicans

One Horseshoe to Rule them All…

The Gormogons Posted on November 19, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Lil Resident insisted that Dr. J. post this today:   One does not simply convert a neigh-sayer… Dr. J.

Continue reading →
Posted in Bronies, Lord of the Rings, My Little Pony, Time Wasting

In Which Dr. J. Employs the Jedi Mind Trick

The Gormogons Posted on November 19, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

The Autumn Fairy turns fallen leaves into Advent Calendars for GoodLil Residents and Medstudents… It’s Christmas time holiday shoppers, and while Mrs. Dr. J., the Lil Resident and Lil Medstudent were at the nearby big box pet-store attending puppy school … Continue reading →

Posted in Dr. J., Fairies, Haggling, Lego, Lil Medstudent, Negotiations, Toys

Forboding Future

The Gormogons Posted on November 19, 2012 by GorTApril 6, 2014

While I know it isn’t pretty, people should take a long, hard look at California and begin wondering what our future holds.  Let me summarize a few data points: The Proposition 30 tax hike (to the tune of $6B) passed … Continue reading →

Posted in (Goin' back to) Cali, California, Democrats, Economics, Taxes

Rounding Up Innocent Mails

The Gormogons Posted on November 19, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The Czar is running behind here. First, thanks to EC who spotted a typo (but missed several others) in an essay that was subsequently corrected. Second, RA writes in: Excellent analysis on the GOP master tactitians. Might I add that … Continue reading →

Posted in Conservatism, Island Dweller, Mailbag, Republicans, Ronald Reagan, Tea Party

GOP Reform IV: Get Some Class

The Gormogons Posted on November 19, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Part Four of Seven Click here for Part Three: Focus, Please It’s time Republicans exposed the Democrats as the fattest cats, the richest SOBs, and the jerk aristocrats they are.If you had a nickel for every time President Obama or … Continue reading →

Posted in class warfare, Conservatism, Democrats, Hypocrisy, Liberals, Republicans

Gun Review: H&K P30

The Gormogons Posted on November 18, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Well, at least the Czar does not have to grouse that we haven’t had a good gun review lately. We just did one yesterday. The Heckler und Koch P30. Remember to pronounced the last word “Coke” to sound authentic. And … Continue reading →

Posted in Firearms, Gun Review, Guns

GOP Reform III: Focus, Please

The Gormogons Posted on November 18, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Part Two of Seven Click here for Part Two: Reagan Isn’t Coming Back Republicans fail to realize how much they step into liberal traps. You wat to win? Start paying attention to the voters, not the liberals.Let us pretend you … Continue reading →

Posted in Conservatism, Democrats, Liberals, Popular Culture, Republicans, Social Justice

Gun Review: Beretta PX4 Storm

The Gormogons Posted on November 17, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The Czar begins every firearm review with some variant of the phrase “It has been a while since our last gun review.” Not the next one. But for this one, yes, it has been a while. The Beretta PX4 Storm. … Continue reading →

Posted in Firearms, Gun Review, Guns

GOP Reform II: Reagan Isn’t Coming Back

The Gormogons Posted on November 17, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Part Two of Seven Click here for Part One: Introduction It is time Republicans started to realize Reagan was a rare event, and that we need to stop listening to the guys trying to bring him back.Ronald Reagan isn’t coming … Continue reading →

Posted in Conservatism, Democrats, Liberals, Republicans, Ronald Reagan, Stupid People, Stupid Politicians, Stupidity

Question(s) of the day

The Gormogons Posted on November 16, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Mandy’s favorite radio host linked to this thought provoking IDF poster on his Facebook page: Question of the day: Why is it that Israel is the only country that is pilloried for defending itself from those who would do her … Continue reading →

Posted in Glenn Beck, Hamas, Hummus, IDF, Israel, Last Tanks in Paris, London, New York, Self Defense, Sydney

Was Sam Adams A Space Monkey? Could Be…

The Gormogons Posted on November 16, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Island Dweller sent a private note that he probably would not want shared with anyone, but he brought up a subtopic within it that the Czar wanted to comment on. So naturally, we are printing the entire humiliating note. Try … Continue reading →

Posted in Intelligence Community, Island Dweller, Lies Lies and More Damn Lies, National Security, Scandals, Security

The Hostess with the Mostest

The Gormogons Posted on November 16, 2012 by GorTApril 6, 2014

Hostess announced plans to shut down this week.  They are facing a workers strike which their CEO has determined they can’t weather over a prolonged period.  The plans include laying off most of their 18,500 strong workforce after a Thursday … Continue reading →

Posted in Business, Economics

GOP Reform I: Introduction

The Gormogons Posted on November 16, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Part One of Seven Forget about who is to blame for the 2012 disaster. Before Republicans regroup to save the country, it’s time to get over ourselves and admit we got beat. Here’s how we keep getting beat. Hint: yeah, … Continue reading →

Posted in Conservatism, Democrats, Liberals, Republicans, What is to be done?

Sequestering My Thoughts

The Gormogons Posted on November 15, 2012 by GorTApril 6, 2014

I was finishing up lunch with some former co-workers today and as I walked out I found myself behind a group of young professionals who were likely in the late 20s or early 30s.  The snippets of their discussion were … Continue reading →

Posted in Defense spending, Entitlements, Federal Budget

In Which Dr. J. Haidt’s on the Election Results

The Gormogons Posted on November 15, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Jonathan Haidt, that is… Last year, Dr. J. jetted up to Washington D.C. to drink a pitcher of Guinness with GorT, and while he was there, he decided to attend a meeting of the Public Responsibility in Medicine and Research … Continue reading →

Posted in 2012 Election, jonathan haidt, social science, The Obama Amateur Hour

Sigh. More Gormogon History

The Gormogons Posted on November 15, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Island Dweller writes in: Your immenseness: A carrier piegon from my esteemed associate currently in the Belly of the Beast has just landed bearing a message expressing wonderment at COMCENTCOM Allen’s prowess with a keyboard (and possibly another instrument). My … Continue reading →

Posted in England, Freemasons, History, Island Dweller, Prince Tochmas, The Czar of Muscovy, The Mandarin

Bad, Bad Teacher, Part 6.022*10^23

The Gormogons Posted on November 14, 2012 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

Mrs. ‘Puter prepares to trap theescaped frog by, uh, … . Never mind.Dang, Mrs. ‘Puter’s hot, though. Did you know that according to the United States Department of Education, public school teachers molest children at nearly 100 times the rate of Roman … Continue reading →

Posted in Bad Bad Teacher, Hot For Teacher, Pornography, Teacher Unions, Teachers, Teaching, Unions

Mailbag – Sailing on the Seven Seas Edition

The Gormogons Posted on November 14, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Reader Uriah Heep writes: Dear Dr. J,  I seem to remember something about a gambling and boozing ship being moored somewhere off the California coast during prohibition to get around the laws against having a good time. If it comes … Continue reading →

Posted in Government Run Healthcare, Mailbag, ObamaCare

A Break from Island Dweller

The Gormogons Posted on November 13, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Well, reader CC writes in: Hi Czar, Or is it theczar? I have been reading your blog for a couple of months now, and only just today, saw your picture. I have one question. Over your lower lip, is that … Continue reading →

Posted in Mailbag, The Czar of Muscovy

Get A Helmet, Shoes Are Dropping

The Gormogons Posted on November 13, 2012 by GorTApril 6, 2014

Dr. J mentions, in reference to companies moving employees to part-time statuses to ease their insurance costs, as something foreseen and he, nor any other Gormogon, was surprised to see it happen.  It is disheartening, which is one of the … Continue reading →

Posted in Economics, Liberal Idiots, Stupid People

You have to pass the bill…

The Gormogons Posted on November 12, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

In order to ensure our security and continuing stability, the Republic will be reorganized into the first Galactic Empire, for a safe and secure society which I assure you will last for ten thousand years…  Obamacare rears its ugly head in the headlines this week. Papa John’s, along with … Continue reading →

Posted in Big Government, Economic policy, Health care, ObamaCare

“We’re Surrounded. That Simplifies The Problem.”*

The Gormogons Posted on November 12, 2012 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

While mucking out his gutters and hanging Christmas lights this weekend, ‘Puter spent some time thinking about conservatism. To hear the liberal media tell it, conservatism has been entirely discredited, and unconditional surrender to the liberal agenda is the only … Continue reading →

Posted in Conservatism, Democrats, Free Advice, Hypocrisy, Liberals, Republicans, Stupid Politicians, USMC

All In

The Gormogons Posted on November 12, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Island Dweller at the Castle bar last night: Your magnificence: I am wondering if the title of Gen. Petraeus’s book has anything to do with the situation vis-a-vis his mistress. It is a most unfortunate choice of title given what … Continue reading →

Posted in CIA, Island Dweller, Sex Milking

The Ponies Have Returned

The Gormogons Posted on November 12, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Our AT&T U-Verse Box, programmed by the Lil Resident to record new episodes of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, delivered the one hour premier to our bin on Saturday. There were squeals of delight as we watched the premiere … Continue reading →

Posted in Bronies, Dr. J., Lil Resident, My Little Pony

Mailbag – Black & White & Red All Over Edition

The Gormogons Posted on November 12, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Our beloved Operative B.G. posted this in the personals section of the New Atlantis Lefty Arts Weekly Paper: Esteemed and Exalted Gormogons,  Although my wife and I are among the half of Americans who pay taxes so the other half … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter's Always Right, Dr. J., GorTechie's Time Travel Adventures, Journalism, Mailbag, Main Stream Media, The Czar Reads HR 3200, The Inscrutable Mandarin, Volgi (pronounced Volgi), Wall Street Journal - WSJ

Guest Post: Island Dweller on Israel Pre-Emption

The Gormogons Posted on November 10, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The Czar is still so irate and humorless with the electorate that he is still willing to yield the floor. Today’s essay has once again been contributed by long-time minion Island Dweller. Dread and awful Czar:Being a life member of … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, Foreign Policy, Guest Writer, Iran, Island Dweller, Israel, The Obama Amateur Hour

Obama’s Coalition: Racist, Stupid And/Or Greedy

The Gormogons Posted on November 9, 2012 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

Pundits have spilled far too much ink recently telling us what Republicans did wrong in this election cycle. It’s well past time to take a closer look at what Democrats did wrong this election cycle, and what it means for … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Good Times' Racist Principle, Barack Obama, Democrats, Liberal Idiots, Obama Administration, Stupid People

Mystic Rhythms

The Gormogons Posted on November 9, 2012 by GorTApril 6, 2014

So many things I think aboutWhen I look far awayThings I know, things I wonderThings I’d like to sayThe more we think we know aboutThe greater the unknownWe suspend our disbeliefAnd we are not alone… Apologies to Rush for the … Continue reading →

Posted in Economics, History, Music

…and in other news…

The Gormogons Posted on November 8, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

The sun still rises in the east… Well, if we’re all going to be hostages of the welfare state, much like in ancient Rome, we can enjoy the bread and circuses. A hot topic that has yet to be posted upon … Continue reading →

Posted in Disney, George Lucas, Star Wars, The Obama Amateur Hour

Guest Post: Island Dweller on China and Japan

The Gormogons Posted on November 8, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The Czar is still so irate and humorless with the electorate that he is perfectly willing to yield the floor. Today’s essay has been contributed by long-time minion Island Dweller. The Czar always expected Japan would need to expand beyond … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, China, Guest Writer, Imperial Japanese Navy, Iran, Island Dweller, Japan, O tempora O mores, U.S. Navy

This Won’t Cheer You Up

The Gormogons Posted on November 8, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Esteemed Operative and Powerful Minion BG writes in with a lament: I used to explain to people why America was different from Europe. It was because our ancestors got fed up and left. They were warned that they knew no … Continue reading →

Posted in Europe, Greece, O tempora O mores, Socialism

Barack, Michelle, Joe and Jill

The Gormogons Posted on November 7, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

I’m pretty sure this isn’t how the Romneys and Ryans were planning on celebrating… h/t National Review Online Dr. J.

Continue reading →
Posted in 2012 Election, Gay Pride, Humor, NRO, Swingers, The Michelle Obama Amateur Hour, The Obama Amateur Hour

A Fifth Thought

The Gormogons Posted on November 7, 2012 by GorTApril 6, 2014

No, this isn’t a reference to GorT polishing off a fifth of Angostura 1824 rum last night.  Given that four of the Gormogons have weighed in on the election night, I figured I’d chime in with my thoughts. I find … Continue reading →

Posted in 2012 Election, Election Results, Future, GorT

Mailbag – Island Time or I Kissed the Dole and I liked it…

The Gormogons Posted on November 7, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Our newest minister of fanmail, the one and only Island Dweller carved the following missive on the Spice-stuffed carcass of a Harkonnen: Sir:  I wish I could share your opinions about what happened last night, but I can’t get the … Continue reading →

Posted in 2012 Election, american exceptionalism, Cardinal Dolan, Island Dweller, Mailbag, Roman Catholics, The Obama Amateur Hour, Unam sanctam catholicam apostolicam ecclesiam, Voting

‘Puter’s Post-Election Pensees

The Gormogons Posted on November 7, 2012 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

‘Puter watched the election returns come in last night. ‘Puter was not amused.  He spent much time sloshing his vodka-rocks-olives (served in a highball tumbler) onto the carpet and raging at the television “reporters” before storming off to bed, muttering … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter, 2012 Election, Democracy, Democrats, Republicans

These Are The Times…

The Gormogons Posted on November 7, 2012 by The MandarinApril 6, 2014

These are the times that try men’s souls. The summer soldier and the sunshine patriot will, in this crisis, shrink from the service of their country; but he that stands it now, deserves the love and thanks of man and … Continue reading →

Posted in Barack Obama, Conservatism, Liberty, Obama Administration, Progressives, Tea Party

Your New Normal

The Gormogons Posted on November 7, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

May her last colors never run. The Czar really wanted to avoid posting anything today except an analysis of why Obama lost. You would have enjoyed reading it; the Czar certainly enjoyed writing it back in September. Suffice it to … Continue reading →

Posted in 2012 Election, american exceptionalism, Americans, Barack Obama, Democrats, Election, Hope and Change, Mitt Romney, Republicans, Stupid People, Stupid Politicians, Un-american, Voting

Mixed Messages

The Gormogons Posted on November 7, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Four more years…of the same old crap. Fox News just called Ohio for President Obama, and with it, the 2012 campaign. What we saw tonight was an incumbent President re-elected, albeit with less support from the electorate. Furthermore, it appears … Continue reading →

Posted in 2012 Election, Gormogons, Shameless Romney 2012ing, The Obama Amateur Hour

Serious Observation

The Gormogons Posted on November 6, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Dread and awful Czar: Today is Hiring Day. I saw your observations about how these cliffhanger elections seem to be occurring more and more frequently, and your analysis makes sense. I’m just sitting here on my island (having already voted) … Continue reading →

Posted in Democracy, Voting

Vote. Please.

The Gormogons Posted on November 6, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Happy Election Day. You have already voted, are about to, or will get to it as soon as you can before your local polls close…right? Remember: this one is historic, and you want to say you were there. For God’s … Continue reading →

Posted in 2012 Election, Election, Psychology, Shameless Romney 2012ing, Voting

This Means Minion War! And a Suggestion.

The Gormogons Posted on November 6, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Minions fighting. DT writes in: Your Magnificence, I write to you in outrage at the Island Dweller’s latest missive to Your Furriness, specifically, he refers to you as, “Your August Majesty”. I have airborne ballet-trained Myrmidons on the way to … Continue reading →

Posted in Mailbag, Minion, Minions, Polls, The Czar of Muscovy

Quick Thoughts

The Gormogons Posted on November 6, 2012 by GorTApril 6, 2014

Numero Uno:  I wonder if the democrats in Maryland have put the following 2+2 together.  The democrats have been pushing against Question 7 (essentially allowing a casino with table games in Maryland) with statements like “the legislature raided the education … Continue reading →

Posted in GorT

Feedback in the Feedbag

The Gormogons Posted on November 5, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Thanks to everyone who read our explanation of political polling. In less than eight hours, it screamed to the top of our all-time most-popular features here at the Big G and got considerable attention from much bigger media outlets. That … Continue reading →

Posted in 2012 Election, Democrats, Election, Mailbag, Math class is hard, Polls, Republicans, Stupidity, Voting

Is that a promise…or a threat?

The Gormogons Posted on November 5, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Michelle Robinson Obama tweets: Dr. J. can imagine: $22T in debt 8% Unemployment in perpetuity A Vulnerable Security Posture The People’s Republic of Moon & Mars $4 Gasoline Higher Electric Bills Doctor’s Office Lines Longer Than Gas Lines Religious Charities … Continue reading →

Posted in 2012 Election, Shameless Romney 2012ing, The Michelle Obama Amateur Hour, The Obama Amateur Hour

BHO – From Desperate to Desperate-er

The Gormogons Posted on November 5, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Photo by John Hart – State Journal Mrs. Dr. J. was disturbed by President Obama’s suggestion over the weekend that voting is the best revenge. “Against who? Against what?” she asked. “He’s the President? What kind of revenge is he … Continue reading →

Posted in 2012 Election, Bruce Springsteen, Mrs. Dr. J., New Jersey, Shameless Romney 2012ing, The Obama Amateur Hour

Dr. J.’s Parish Voter’s Guide

The Gormogons Posted on November 5, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

According to Milton:Lucifer was the most beautiful of God’s Angels Dr. J. made it to mass this weekend after an unusually spotty (2 for 4)  record in October (Dr. J. isn’t perfect and God is infinite in his forgiveness). His … Continue reading →

Posted in 2012 Election, Roman Catholics, Shameless Romney 2012ing, The Obama Amateur Hour, Unam sanctam catholicam apostolicam ecclesiam

Why The Polls Are Screwy (Best to Ignore Them)

The Gormogons Posted on November 5, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

The Czar stopped looking at day-to-day polling on Friday, when it became clear that all of it had become complete nonsense. Normally at election time, the media polls favor the Democrats in big numbers in order to starve money from … Continue reading →

Posted in Democrats, Math class is hard, Polls, Republicans, Stupidity, Voting

Mailbag – Cavalier Edition

The Gormogons Posted on November 5, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Operative JF writes in regarding the lovely Lady J.: Beautiful!  At one time had two of them (CKCS’s, that is). Mine were totally elfin’ untrainable – probably because they (2 sisters) were the litter.  But you can forget all that … Continue reading →

Posted in Chevy Cavalier, Mailbag

It Really Matters

The Gormogons Posted on November 4, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

This time more than you remember. And do yourself a major favor this time—do a straight-line GOP vote. The Czar of MuscovyБожію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes … Continue reading →

Posted in Public Service Messages, Voting

Saturday

The Gormogons Posted on November 3, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

A decent Saturday afternoon. Four-and-a-half acres of wooded, private property. Decent beer. Hot dogs cooked over a five-foot fire pit. We taught a group of kids how to display and fold a flag correctly; Царевич and his buddy did the … Continue reading →

Posted in The Czar of Muscovy

Lest One Think Otherwise

The Gormogons Posted on November 2, 2012 by GorTApril 6, 2014

The Czar usually camps out at the Castle Maildrop grabbing all the post that the mailman delivers but Sleestak distracted him with leftover Halloween candy.  So he missed the following mail from our Castle Archivist: Spot on, sir, with the … Continue reading →

Posted in Mailbag

Zombie Mail

The Gormogons Posted on November 2, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Write a nice piece on All Saint’s Day, and not a drop of mail. Write a piece on zombies attacking, and après moi, le déluge. Some of the best. JS writes in: Dear Sovereign Czar, I enjoyed your post on … Continue reading →

Posted in Mailbag, zombie apocalypse

The Adult Campaign vs. The ‘Adult’ Campaign

The Gormogons Posted on November 2, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

Growing up, Dr. J. would watch the conventions, debates and advertisements, and while he was raised a conservative, he was taught to learn about the issues, where the parties stand, and who the candidates are before pulling a lever. Papa … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized

Introducing Lady J.

The Gormogons Posted on November 2, 2012 by Dr. J.April 6, 2014

The Czar loves puppies…Dr. J. is sure he’s coveting… Dr. J. has been up to his eyeballs this week. On Sunday, we added a new member to the J. Clan. Namely Lady J. Lady J. is a Cavalier King Charles … Continue reading →

Posted in Dr. J., Lady J., Mrs. Dr. J., New Atlantis, Puppies, The Czar of Muscovy

All Saint’s Day

The Gormogons Posted on November 1, 2012 by GorTApril 6, 2014

GorT works 20-25 miles away from home and as today is a Holy Day of Obligation for Catholics, I surfed around on MassTimes.org and found a couple local parishes that had mid-day Masses.  I chose one and arrived 5 minutes … Continue reading →

Posted in Big Government, Charity, Roman Catholics

Why Healthcare Insurance At All?

The Gormogons Posted on November 1, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Super-Minion ScottO (um, which probably he should resist putting on a résumé) leaves us this quill-penned note tacked to our wooden door: Dread Czar, While I appreciate your position, and that of the self-employed RA, and I certainly agree that … Continue reading →

Posted in Health care, Insurance

Very Last Minute Halloween Costume Idea

The Gormogons Posted on November 1, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

From Island Dweller, who like most island dwellers is so laid back he waits until the thirteenth hour to get anything done: Your most august majesty: I beg your forgiveness for positing this idea one day after it could have … Continue reading →

Posted in Halloween, Mailbag

How a Romney Presidency Actually Will Be Different

The Gormogons Posted on November 1, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

Things will be different, we can safely say. Indeed, has not every newly elected President said that? After promises, and hand shakes, and baby kisses, every new President insists this time it will be different. And yet, it always winds … Continue reading →

Posted in Mitt Romney, President

Zombies: Things You Need Not Worry About

The Gormogons Posted on November 1, 2012 by The Czar of MuscovyApril 6, 2014

¡Feliz Dia de los Muertos! As you know, today is Mexico’s Day of the Dead, which is the day of the year that all of Mexico’s recently departed rise to life to eat the brains of the living. A week … Continue reading →

Posted in zombie apocalypse

Visitor’s Guide

About Us

A secret society dedicated to the restoration of the Kingdom of Poland-Lithuania, the imprisonment of Esperanto speakers, and furthering the eschatological doctrine of the Return from Occultation of the Thirteenth Imam, Val Kilmer. Seriously, what happened to that guy? He was awesome in Tombstone. ایمام سیزدهم

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To contact your hosts and pledge your undying obedience, e-mail dr.j, gort, puter, theczar, themandarin or thenotoriousoev followed by the at sign, gormogons, then a ., and finally, com.

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