Pundits have spilled far too much ink recently telling us what Republicans did wrong in this election cycle. It’s well past time to take a closer look at what Democrats did wrong this election cycle, and what it means for America’s future.
President Obama’s reelection team ran one of the most scorched earth and cynical campaigns ‘Puter has ever seen. In so doing, Team Obama assembled a majority coalition consisting on the following subsets:
These groups are not exclusive. An Obama voter can be a member of one or more of these groups. Let’s take a closer look at these groups in order, from least morally culpable to absolutely morally bankrupt.
This group is comprised primarily of Black Americans, who gave Obama 93% of their votes. ‘Puter doesn’t harbor any great animus towards Blacks for voting for one of their own. After all, Americans have a long and glorious history of minority groups banding together in support of one of their own, no matter how incapable and dangerous that person may be.
To wit, Roman Catholics supported John F. Kennedy when he ran for president in 1960. After all, he was one of us. Never mind that his family made its money in criminal enterprises. And that little issue with Joe Kennedy, the clan patriarch, being openly pro-Nazi in the run up to World War II? Water under the bridge. Kennedy’s our guy! Never mind that he was permanently stoned on pain killers, was probably an alcoholic and that he won Illinois because his corrupt family paid the union to stuff the ballot boxes in Chicago. Catholics of American, unite! You have nothing to lose but your self-respect!
See also, middle-aged, horny men with a fetish for zaftig interns. This group supported Bill Clinton almost to a man in both of his elections. They stood behind him even when salacious news spread that he had treated a female intern as a human-dor, storing his cigars in her moist confines. Heck, they even stood behind him when he lied about having “sexual relations” with the aforementioned zaftig intern, until he was undone by a blue dress crusted with his macho gazpacho the zaftig intern saved as a memento of her time spent on her knees.
So what’s it to Americans that Black Americans, almost to a man, voted to reelect Obama? Why should it matter to the rest of us that an unqualified president who thinks the Constitution is inapplicable to him is unthinkingly the object of worship to a large subset of Americans? It’s not as if Obama’s waging two perpetual wars, holding prisoners in Guantanamo without trial, attacking American’s freedom of religion, spending us into oblivion or rewriting the social contract against a majority’s wishes.
‘Puter understands Blacks voting for Obama. But Blacks shouldn’t pretend they voted for Obama en masse because he was the best candidate. Blacks voted for Obama primarily, and in many cases solely, because Obama was Black. And voting for someone based primarily or only because of his skin color is racist.
And if Roman Catholicism was an immutable characteristic (‘Puter claims it is. As is the IRA, so is the Holy Mother Church: Once in, never out), ‘Puter would call his co-religionists racist, too.
This group’s unquestioning loyalty to Obama is racist, but to ‘Puter’s mind, understandable and forgivable.
Look to your left. Now look to your right. Two out of the three of you (include yourself) are in this group: Americans who are bad at math.
This group doesn’t grasp what it means to borrow 40 cents of every dollar we spend as a country. This group can’t comprehend America’s debt is $16,220,456,928,177.11(that’s about $16.2 trillion, for the math impaired), much less calculate that their individual share of that debt is $51,683.92.
These Americans certainly can’t determine that, assuming a weighted average coupon on all outstanding federal debt instruments of about 2.71%, that’s an annual interest cost to the government of $439,574,382,753.60 (or, about $439.5 billion for those of you terrified of any number greater than the sum of your extant digits). This figure assumes two things. First, interest rates don’t rise. Second, Obama and Congress don’t add to the debt.
Let’s assume for the moment that Obama and Congress continue to run a $1,000,000,000,000.00 (that’s $1 trillion, for you teachers’ union members) annual deficit (the gap between revenue and expenditures on an annual budgeted basis), and let us further assume that Congress and Obama borrow the money by issuing debt, rather than increasing revenues, which is what they have done to date. And since we all know that interest rates are historically low and can’t stay this low forever, let’s assume interest rates on issued federal debt instruments grow at an annual average of 0.50% aggregate.
At the end of Obama’s second term, that means the federal debt would be approximately $20,500,000,000,000.00. It also means what the weighted average coupon on issued debt would be about 4.75%. That’s an annual interest cost of $973,750,000,000.00, or $2,950.76 in interest payments alone per American each year, assuming 330,000,000 Americans. If we assume that all the debt would mature and be due and owing at the end of Obama’s second term, each one of us would have to pony up $62,121.21 to pay off the nation’s credit card.
There are reasonable assumptions. If these don’t scare the ever-loving urine out of you, it should. And you belong in this group. This group that prefers to whistle past the graveyard and, in a Dr. Evil like manner, assume everything will go to plan.
Not only can’t this group of hardcore Obama voters not do basic math on big numbers like the national debt, this group doesn’t grasp that Social Security, Medicare, Medicaid and the other federal welfare programs comprised in 2011 54% of the federal budget, which percentage grows each year as more Americans retire, or simply get tired of working get a disability retirement.
‘Puter got into a bit of scrap yesterday with one of his liberal (but loveable) college buddies. This buddy grew up in Massachusetts, and now is a college professor in Massachusetts. He is a very, very bright guy, witty, nice and fun to hang out with. And he doesn’t understand basic finance. ‘Puter stated that Social Security was bankrupt. This buddy insisted that Social Security was solvent because it had a “trust fund” worth around $1.7 trillion.
‘Puter had to politely explain that the so-called “trust fund” is nothing more than a pile of IOUs, the equivalent of you giving yourself a promissory note for $10.00, promptly spending the $10.00 you’ve borrowed from yourself and treating that $10.00 promissory note as an asset rather than a liability. That’s all the Social Security “trust fund” is: a pile of IOUs it owes to itself. To repay those IOUs, Social Security (the federal government) has two choices: tax Americans more or borrow more money. There’s no asset to liquidate and resulting proceeds to apply against the Social Security obligations. Social Security is a Ponzi scheme, nothing more and nothing less.
It’s just this type of person that rails against math, claiming against all evidence to the contrary that Social Security is solvent, Medicare is just fine, thank you very much and Medicaid reform is racist.
It’s just this type of person who claims that the national debt is nothing to worry about, blithely ignoring the welfare riots in Greece and the teetering European Union as harbingers of doom for the United States.
For too long this group of voters has insisted that feelings and so-called “social justice” matter most, and that math is for nerds. Well, like the Tri-Lams and the Omega Mus the nerds will have their revenge. Math nerds are the original reality based community.
‘Puter finds stupid voters morally culpable, worthy of our scorn and derision when the looming economic collapse happens and they aimlessly wander claiming to all who will listen that no one could have seen this coming.
Stupid voters, like all voters, have a civic and moral duty to inform themselves on all issues of import surrounding any election. Ignoring an issue, or insisting on believing the unbelievable claims of Obama despite their obvious falsity, is derelict.
And, as this past election proves beyond all doubt, a substantial portion of Americans are willing to not only ignore, but to actively disbelieve, facts.
‘Puter doesn’t have much to say about this group. We all know who these folks are. People who are willing to stand idly by and watch their nation collapse a few years down the road so long as the checks keep coming in the meantime.
‘Puter counts at a minimum the following groups as people who would sell their mother into white slavery to keep the government checks coming:
There’s probably tons more folks to list, but ‘Puter’s so thoroughly disgusted with this group of truly evil people, willing to harm others to benefit themselves, that he’s done with them.
Yes, Obama won the election. Yes, he cobbled together a winning coalition of fellow travelers. But at what cost to America?
Time will tell.
Always right, unless he isn’t, the infallible Ghettoputer F. X. Gormogons claims to be an in-law of the Volgi, although no one really believes this.
’Puter carefully follows economic and financial trends, legal affairs, and serves as the Gormogons’ financial and legal advisor. He successfully defended us against a lawsuit from a liquor distributor worth hundreds of thousands of dollars in unpaid deliveries of bootleg shandies.
The Geep has an IQ so high it is untestable and attempts to measure it have resulted in dangerously unstable results as well as injuries to researchers. Coincidentally, he publishes intelligence tests as a side gig.
His sarcasm is so highly developed it borders on the psychic, and he is often able to insult a person even before meeting them. ’Puter enjoys hunting small game with 000 slugs and punt guns, correcting homilies in real time at Mass, and undermining unions. ’Puter likes to wear a hockey mask and carry an axe into public campgrounds, where he bursts into people’s tents and screams. As you might expect, he has been shot several times but remains completely undeterred.
He assures us that his obsessive fawning over news stories involving women teachers sleeping with young students is not Freudian in any way, although he admits something similar once happened to him. Uniquely, ’Puter is unable to speak, read, or write Russian, but he is able to sing it fluently.
Geep joined the order in the mid-1980s. He arrived at the Castle door with dozens of steamer trunks and an inarticulate hissing creature of astonishingly low intelligence he calls “Sleestak.” Ghettoputer appears to make his wishes known to Sleestak, although no one is sure whether this is the result of complex sign language, expert body posture reading, or simply beating Sleestak with a rubber mallet.
‘Puter suggests the Czar suck it.