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Monthly Archives: September 2015

ŒV: EXCLUSIVE! TRUMP CAUGHT ON OPEN MIC!

The Gormogons Posted on September 27, 2015 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.September 27, 2015

Confucius, Œc. Vol.Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu. 3.14.242.153

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Pontificating on the Pontiff

The Gormogons Posted on September 27, 2015 by GorTSeptember 27, 2015

I have to admit that this week has been inspiring.  My Facebook feed hasn’t been filled with garbage – only positive stories and experiences.  I’m sure between John Boehner’s resignation, more Clinton emails being released, and something that Trump did … Continue reading →

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How to Inflate a Cat in 2 Easy Steps!

The Gormogons Posted on September 24, 2015 by The Czar of MuscovySeptember 24, 2015

The Czar had this unsigned message hurled into the head of a Tcho-Tcho, as a brick carefully tied to a piece of paper. More curiously, the note was scrawled onto the brick; the paper was blank. Perhaps an atavistic envelope? … Continue reading →

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20 Catholic Questions: ‘Puter Sits Down With Meghan McCain

The Gormogons Posted on September 23, 2015 by 'PuterSeptember 23, 2015

As you may have heard, Pope Francis arrived in the United States yesterday for his first visit. The Pope will visit Washington, Philadelphia, and New York City during his stay. As most newscasters have little to no comprehension of any … Continue reading →

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Dr. Carson Was Not In Error

The Gormogons Posted on September 22, 2015 by The Czar of MuscovySeptember 22, 2015

Dr. Ben Carson was not wrong to say that a Muslim should not be put in charge of this nation. He was wrong to answer the question in the first place, since it was clearly a ploy by an increasingly … Continue reading →

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Exoplanetology

The Gormogons Posted on September 21, 2015 by The Czar of MuscovySeptember 21, 2015

Sciencey readers may have learned that giant exoplanet Beta Pictoris b has been photographed to unprecedented detail. Here is the picture of the world, about 63 light years away. Amazing. Anyway, thanks to the Gormogons’ proprietary super-advanced high-resolution image rendering … Continue reading →

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Thoughts on the CNN Train wreck

The Gormogons Posted on September 17, 2015 by GorTSeptember 17, 2015

Mr. and Mrs. GorT watched about two-thirds of the second Republican debate last night.  We both found it amusing, insightful, and a bit of a train wreck.  GorT jumped on Twitter for a while – and his secondary processing unit … Continue reading →

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Debate Round Up To the Least Common Denominator

The Gormogons Posted on September 17, 2015 by The MandarinSeptember 17, 2015

Hello, children. Hello. Your Mandarin watched the debates last night and as a long-standing Gormogons tradition, wanted to put down his thoughts as to what most of you saw for yourselves. Truly it was a painfully long debate, with insufficient … Continue reading →

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Razor Sharp Thoughts

The Gormogons Posted on September 16, 2015 by The Czar of MuscovySeptember 16, 2015

The understands that a lot of men think a beard is very manly. The Czar agrees, but reminds everyone that most manly thing is—whether you have a beard or not—knowing how to shave correctly. Operative SMR throws in some gravy … Continue reading →

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Shaving Margins

The Gormogons Posted on September 15, 2015 by The Czar of MuscovySeptember 15, 2015

The explosion (figurative speaking, relax) of cheap razor blade “clubs” is in response to something many adults have wondered about: why the hell are razor blades so expensive? Good heavens, they keep them locked up next to the good cognacs … Continue reading →

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Socialism and Nuts

The Gormogons Posted on September 14, 2015 by The Czar of MuscovySeptember 14, 2015

Dear Your Czarness: Please pardon a humble minion, but I wish to draw your attention to the media coverage of the “European Refugee Crisis,” which has risen to such a crescendo-of-crap (™ pending!) that I simply must disturb the serenity … Continue reading →

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America Needs To Grow [The Heck] Up

The Gormogons Posted on September 10, 2015 by 'PuterSeptember 10, 2015

What ‘Puter meant to say was, “America needs to grow the f*ck up.” We have become a nation of perpetual teenagers. We want all of the privileges of adulthood and none of the responsibilities. We have become a nation of … Continue reading →

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Let’s Dust Off the Dust Up

The Gormogons Posted on September 9, 2015 by The Czar of MuscovySeptember 9, 2015

Last week, the Czar took the position that the Kim Davis story, while interesting, featured some big mistakes by both sides. This prompted The One—no, not that One, the one in Nebraska—to write in. Dearest Czarczar, I agree with you … Continue reading →

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A Labor of Love

The Gormogons Posted on September 8, 2015 by The Czar of MuscovySeptember 8, 2015

The Czar is by no means finished with his summer, least of all does he contemplate putting away any of his extensive platoon of grilling equipment. However, the Czar has noticed that his collection of ideas for the platoon was … Continue reading →

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Kentucky Wannabe Politicians Should Just Shut Up

The Gormogons Posted on September 4, 2015 by The Czar of MuscovySeptember 4, 2015

As you have heard—because by God the media are all beside themselves on this—a county clerk in Kentucky named Kim Davis refused to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples (which is legal in Kentucky). She was jailed for contempt of … Continue reading →

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Arguing with a Child

The Gormogons Posted on September 2, 2015 by GorTSeptember 2, 2015

Anytime the Clintons get into hot water, they defend themselves like a teenager defending themselves when confronted by a parent.  “No, Mom, I said that I was going to be at Kelly’s house.  I just didn’t say where I was going … Continue reading →

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Confiscation Theater and the Theater of Confiscation

The Gormogons Posted on September 1, 2015 by The Czar of MuscovySeptember 1, 2015

It’s been about 25 years since Uncle Jay wrote in with a question or observation, and he makes up for it by providing both. And, better still, on one of our favorite subjects here at the Big G, firearms. Most … Continue reading →

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A secret society dedicated to the restoration of the Kingdom of Poland-Lithuania, the imprisonment of Esperanto speakers, and furthering the eschatological doctrine of the Return from Occultation of the Thirteenth Imam, Val Kilmer. Seriously, what happened to that guy? He was awesome in Tombstone. ایمام سیزدهم

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