↓
 

The Gormogons

Home→Categories Upstate

Category Archives: Upstate

Mrs. ‘Puter’s Birthday Weekend: Dinner, Show, Oktoberfest, Yinzers

The Gormogons Posted on September 16, 2013 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

Mrs. ‘Puter, Big Red and Mrs. TheCzar model the latest in Oktoberfestfashion. Not really, but in ‘Puter’s demented mind, this is how hepictures it. ‘Puter spent Mrs. ‘Puter’s birthday weekend thusly. Friday evening, ‘Puter squired The Missus to dinner at … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter, Beer, Family, Gormogonica, Happy Birthday, Love Boat, Mrs. 'Puter, Upstate

‘Puter’s Travel Guides: New York State Geography For Dummies

The Gormogons Posted on July 19, 2013 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

Shamelessly stolen from Buzzfeed, here is all you need to know about New York State.  Please memorize these two simple lessons before coming to New York. Better, please memorize these two lessons before saying anything remotely related to New York … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter, Etruscan for Business Travellers, New York, NYC, Stupidity, Upstate

‘Puter Update And Assorted Marginalia

The Gormogons Posted on November 1, 2011 by 'PuterApril 6, 2014

It’s been a while since ‘Puter’s taken time out to write concerning his rather boring life, rather than his over-the-top convictions, so here’s a status update for you. 1. ‘Puter’s off the Strattera for his ADHD. The medication had, for … Continue reading →

Posted in 'Puter, ADHD, Leftism, Upstate, Whole Foods

I Loathe New York, Part Deux

The Gormogons Posted on February 11, 2011 by 'PuterApril 7, 2014

Avid Gormogon readers know ‘Puter lives somewhere in the frozen tundra known as Upstate New York. Readers also know it takes a special kind of person to live Upstate. One who overlooks the little things, like crumbling infrastructure, sky high … Continue reading →

Posted in Stupid Politicians, Upstate

We’re Number One

The Gormogons Posted on September 29, 2010 by 'PuterApril 7, 2014

By now, regular readers have figured out that ‘Puter lives somewhere in the Greater Rochester area of Upstate New York. Some of ‘Puter’s frequent readers have queried as to why ‘Puter, raging libertarian conservative, lives in deep blue New York. … Continue reading →

Posted in Property Taxes, Upstate

Genny, Genny, Who Can I Turn To?

The Gormogons Posted on August 24, 2010 by 'PuterApril 7, 2014

Upstate New York is on its way to becoming a drunkard’s paradise, thanks to Genesee Brewing. When a 12 ounce curl isn’t enough, the home of the Green Death brings you a 24 ounce can. ‘Puter’s favorite part of the … Continue reading →

Posted in Upstate

Petty Annoyance of the Day

The Gormogons Posted on December 1, 2009 by 'PuterDecember 1, 2009

Today, in the course of his gainful employ, ‘Puter was tasked with gathering certain information regarding deed stamps (property transfer tax) forms in New York. ‘Puter called the custodian of these records and politely asked whether, in fact, the forms … Continue reading →

Posted in Gubbamint, New York, Upstate

At Last!

The Gormogons Posted on November 17, 2009 by 'PuterNovember 17, 2009

Our long national nightmare is over! Or at least our Upstate nightmare. Goodbye, Coach Dick Jauron. Don’t let the door hit you on the way out. And, too bad for the Redskins that owners can’t be fired. 'PuterAlways right, unless … Continue reading →

Posted in NFL, Upstate

Upstate Horndogs

The Gormogons Posted on November 10, 2009 by 'PuterNovember 10, 2009

‘Puter’s never been so proud to live Upstate. According to Google Trends and The Business Insider, Upstate’s got two of the top 10 most obscene places in the country (Albany and Rochester). When the winters are long and the jobs … Continue reading →

Posted in Upstate

New And Improved Upstate

The Gormogons Posted on September 15, 2009 by 'PuterSeptember 15, 2009

Now with more Manson Family members! That horrible crunching sound you’re hearing is the skulls of all the local Chambers of Commerce presidents smacking against their office walls. 'PuterAlways right, unless he isn’t, the infallible Ghettoputer F. X. Gormogons claims … Continue reading →

Posted in Manson Family, Upstate

Left Behind!

The Gormogons Posted on July 10, 2009 by 'PuterJuly 10, 2009

If you wonder where all your friendly neighborhood Mormons have gone this weekend, stop wondering. No, they weren’t raptured off to heaven (not to mix wacky evangelical Christian concepts with quasi-Christian Mormonism). They’ve all come Upstate to attend the Hill … Continue reading →

Posted in Mormons, Upstate

Upstate Imitates Pennsyltucky

The Gormogons Posted on April 23, 2009 by 'PuterApril 23, 2009

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, after all, but these Upstate antics take the cake. It’s got all the elements of a tragi-comedy. Drunkeness, jaw-dropping stupidity, unintended humor, dramatic irony. Now we know the answer to the age-old riddle … Continue reading →

Posted in Drunks, Pennsyltucky, Upstate

Upstate Update

The Gormogons Posted on April 13, 2009 by 'PuterApril 13, 2009

Governor Paterson’s wife thinks his poor poll ratings are caused by New Yorkers’ latent racism. Mrs. Paterson is wrong. We can’t stand Gov. Paterson because he allowed a budget with a 9% spending increase to pass without veto in the … Continue reading →

Posted in David Paterson, IDAs, Michigan, Shelly Silver, Upstate

The Czar writes in to say…

The Gormogons Posted on February 25, 2009 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.February 25, 2009

…in response to Ghettoputer’s commentary on Mr. Turo, the 700-pound man accused of dealing prescription drugs out of his house, that he’s familiar with Mr. Turo’s attorney in the case, a Mr. B. Fortuna, Esq. (at right in their court … Continue reading →

Posted in Star Wars, Upstate

Only Upstate

The Gormogons Posted on January 18, 2009 by 'PuterJanuary 18, 2009

Can a man get arrested for throwing pussy at his wife.  Really. And, as always, thanks to the delightfully nicknamed D&C out of Rochester, poorer, rattier cousin of the soon-to-be-defunct Buffalo Nooz. And Spaghetti Cat.  Who can live without Spaghetti … Continue reading →

Posted in Cat Tossing, D and C, Palmyra, Upstate

Congress Am Stoopid. Rep Slaughter Am Really Stoopid.

The Gormogons Posted on January 6, 2009 by 'PuterJanuary 6, 2009

Meet Rep. Louise Slaughter (D-NY28), 12 term representative, native of Kentucky (with the accent to match), and arguably the second most powerful woman in Congress, as chairman of the Rules Committee. In the best New York Tammany Hall style politics, … Continue reading →

Posted in Gasoline Prices, Louise Slaughter, Upstate

Upstate

The Gormogons Posted on December 16, 2008 by Confucius, Œc. Vol.December 16, 2008

(a) Upstate New Yorkers, like Ohioans, ARE Midwesterners, even if it’d crush their remaining aspirations towards East Coast sophistication to admit it. But guess what, folks, if the Great Lakes are your “ocean,” you’re a Midwesterner. (b) You guys went … Continue reading →

Posted in Gormogonica, Upstate

Upstate Goodness

The Gormogons Posted on December 16, 2008 by 'PuterDecember 16, 2008

‘Puter feels badly. He’s always bashing Upstate because of its soul-crushing taxes and intrusive (and omnipresent) government. But there are some really great things about Upstate. The people are fantastic, as nice as Midwesterners for the most part. And, for … Continue reading →

Posted in Upstate

Best O.P. Warehousing Ad Copy. Ever.

The Gormogons Posted on November 13, 2008 by 'PuterNovember 13, 2008

First, O.P. is ‘Puter’s code word for old people. It’s so much nicer than ‘Puter’s other phrases for elderly, and sounds cooler than “seasoned citizens.” ‘Puter hates that phrase. And “O.P.” doesn’t tip off the O.P.s that you’re talking about … Continue reading →

Posted in O.P.s, Upstate, Warehousing

Election Day

The Gormogons Posted on November 4, 2008 by 'PuterNovember 4, 2008

For whatever it’s worth, ‘Puter voted at 8:40 this morning in his undisclosed location in scenic Upstate. The weather couldn’t be better. No rain in the forecast at all. It’s going to be around 70 today in early November, which … Continue reading →

Posted in Election, Upstate

Oh, It’s On Now!

The Gormogons Posted on October 20, 2008 by 'PuterOctober 20, 2008

The happiest time of the year has arrived again, right on schedule. That’s right, New York’s southern zone bowhunting season opened this past Saturday at sunrise. Expect ‘Puter’s postings to be sparse on the weekends, as he tries to get … Continue reading →

Posted in Bow Opener, Upstate, White Tail Deer

Visitor’s Guide

About Us

A secret society dedicated to the restoration of the Kingdom of Poland-Lithuania, the imprisonment of Esperanto speakers, and furthering the eschatological doctrine of the Return from Occultation of the Thirteenth Imam, Val Kilmer. Seriously, what happened to that guy? He was awesome in Tombstone. ایمام سیزدهم

Scribble, scribble…

To contact your hosts and pledge your undying obedience, e-mail dr.j, gort, puter, theczar, themandarin or thenotoriousoev followed by the at sign, gormogons, then a ., and finally, com.

De Gormogonorum Mysteriis

Archives

  • July 2024
  • July 2023
  • February 2023
  • August 2022
  • June 2022
  • May 2022
  • March 2022
  • January 2022
  • December 2021
  • November 2021
  • October 2021
  • September 2021
  • August 2021
  • July 2021
  • June 2021
  • May 2021
  • April 2021
  • March 2021
  • January 2021
  • December 2020
  • October 2020
  • September 2020
  • August 2020
  • July 2020
  • June 2020
  • May 2020
  • April 2020
  • March 2020
  • February 2020
  • January 2020
  • December 2019
  • November 2019
  • October 2019
  • September 2019
  • August 2019
  • July 2019
  • June 2019
  • May 2019
  • April 2019
  • March 2019
  • February 2019
  • January 2019
  • December 2018
  • November 2018
  • October 2018
  • September 2018
  • August 2018
  • July 2018
  • June 2018
  • May 2018
  • April 2018
  • March 2018
  • February 2018
  • January 2018
  • December 2017
  • November 2017
  • October 2017
  • September 2017
  • August 2017
  • July 2017
  • June 2017
  • May 2017
  • April 2017
  • March 2017
  • February 2017
  • January 2017
  • December 2016
  • November 2016
  • October 2016
  • September 2016
  • August 2016
  • July 2016
  • June 2016
  • May 2016
  • April 2016
  • March 2016
  • February 2016
  • January 2016
  • December 2015
  • November 2015
  • October 2015
  • September 2015
  • August 2015
  • July 2015
  • June 2015
  • May 2015
  • April 2015
  • March 2015
  • February 2015
  • January 2015
  • December 2014
  • November 2014
  • October 2014
  • September 2014
  • August 2014
  • July 2014
  • June 2014
  • May 2014
  • April 2014
  • March 2014
  • February 2014
  • January 2014
  • December 2013
  • November 2013
  • October 2013
  • September 2013
  • August 2013
  • July 2013
  • June 2013
  • May 2013
  • April 2013
  • March 2013
  • February 2013
  • January 2013
  • December 2012
  • November 2012
  • October 2012
  • September 2012
  • August 2012
  • July 2012
  • June 2012
  • May 2012
  • April 2012
  • March 2012
  • February 2012
  • January 2012
  • December 2011
  • November 2011
  • October 2011
  • September 2011
  • August 2011
  • July 2011
  • June 2011
  • May 2011
  • April 2011
  • March 2011
  • February 2011
  • January 2011
  • December 2010
  • November 2010
  • October 2010
  • September 2010
  • August 2010
  • July 2010
  • June 2010
  • May 2010
  • April 2010
  • March 2010
  • February 2010
  • January 2010
  • December 2009
  • November 2009
  • October 2009
  • September 2009
  • August 2009
  • July 2009
  • June 2009
  • May 2009
  • April 2009
  • March 2009
  • February 2009
  • January 2009
  • December 2008
  • November 2008
  • October 2008
  • September 2008
  • August 2008
  • July 2008
  • January 2000
  • September 1999
  • July 1998
  • May 1998
  • September 1997
  • August 1997
  • July 1997
  • February 1997
  • September 1996
  • August 1996
  • September 1995
  • May 1995
  • July 1994
  • April 1994
  • March 1994
  • February 1994
  • October 1993
  • March 1992
  • May 1990
  • September 1988
  • December 1986
  • September 1981
  • September 1979
  • May 1977
  • July 1976
  • May 1972
  • December 1970
  • August 1970
©2025 - The Gormogons - Weaver Xtreme Theme
↑
Manage Cookie Consent
To provide the best experiences, we use technologies like cookies to store and/or access device information. Consenting to these technologies will allow us to process data such as browsing behavior or unique IDs on this site. Not consenting or withdrawing consent, may adversely affect certain features and functions.
Functional Always active
The technical storage or access is strictly necessary for the legitimate purpose of enabling the use of a specific service explicitly requested by the subscriber or user, or for the sole purpose of carrying out the transmission of a communication over an electronic communications network.
Preferences
The technical storage or access is necessary for the legitimate purpose of storing preferences that are not requested by the subscriber or user.
Statistics
The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for statistical purposes. The technical storage or access that is used exclusively for anonymous statistical purposes. Without a subpoena, voluntary compliance on the part of your Internet Service Provider, or additional records from a third party, information stored or retrieved for this purpose alone cannot usually be used to identify you.
Marketing
The technical storage or access is required to create user profiles to send advertising, or to track the user on a website or across several websites for similar marketing purposes.
Manage options Manage services Manage {vendor_count} vendors Read more about these purposes
View preferences
{title} {title} {title}