NEW FROM YOUR FRIENDS AT GORMO-ARMS!

Hey, have you ever noticed that your AR-15 is looking all drab and low definition? That’s because the AR-15 was designed in the 1950s, in the analog days: that’s why most of them aren’t even in color!

Stop shooting rounds at dreary old targets, and move up to the exciting world of ULTRA HIGH DEF with the new Gormo Arms AR-15 4K! That’s right: 4 times the resolution of high definition. Your shots will never be more accurate.

Look at the difference!

Most AR-15s are dreary and drab and washed out when viewed close up.

The Gormo Arms AR-15 4K has incredible resolution even when zoomed in 400%

Stop firing those tired old AR-15s and step into the 21st Century with the new Gormo Arms AR-15 4K. Available in Hello Kitty, coyote, ostrich, leopard, kale, and Fallout 4 skins.

Must ship to either a FFL or a non-regulated gun show where you can just grab a loophole full of stuff and go with no background checks.

The Czar of Muscovy

Божію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia upon the death of Boris Mikhailovich, who replaced Alexander Yaroslav Nevsky in 1263. However, in 1283, our Czar was passed over due to a clerical error and the rule of all Russia went to his second cousin Daniil (Даниил Александрович), whom Czar still resents. As a half-hearted apology, the Czar was awarded control over Muscovy, inconveniently located 5,000 miles away just outside Chicago. He now spends his time seething about this and writing about other stuff that bothers him.