After 8 years of an obnoxious president, voters realized Hillary Clinton would be just as bad, and perhaps worse, than her predecessor; thus motivated, they turned out in respectable numbers to vote for an alternative, even though he was a freak show of a human. At least they would know, going in, what they’d be getting with Donald Trump. So he won more states than Hillary Clinton, who arrogantly didn’t bother to even campaign in most states, giving him an electoral win. Meanwhile, California voted overwhelmingly for Hillary Clinton by almost three million more votes than she got anywhere else.
Working in collusion with Donald Trump, on whom they have grave and serious information somehow unavailable to the media, Russian intelligence agents seeking to boost Putin’s popularity in the United States, convince FBI director James Comey to announce—maybe even the night before the election—that Hillary Clinton would not be charged with criminal negligence based on her own staff’s inability to secure an email server, which the Russians hacked as practice for using their computers to control the votes in the election to such an extent that Hillary Clinton wins the popular vote but manages to lose every state she refused to visit during the election. And that’s why Trump’s win is a trick and he needs to step down, letting her win the presidency instead of ceding the job to the vice president-elect.
Choose your ending to 2016. For what it’s worth, Vice President Joe Biden publicly stated he believes option 1.
Божію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia upon the death of Boris Mikhailovich, who replaced Alexander Yaroslav Nevsky in 1263. However, in 1283, our Czar was passed over due to a clerical error and the rule of all Russia went to his second cousin Daniil (Даниил Александрович), whom Czar still resents. As a half-hearted apology, the Czar was awarded control over Muscovy, inconveniently located 5,000 miles away just outside Chicago. He now spends his time seething about this and writing about other stuff that bothers him.