2018 World Cup Update #2
With each country having played two games so far in the pool round, let’s check in on the Gormogon standings:
#1 Dr. J | 15 pts | Uruguay, France, and a surprisingly strong Croatia team are powering Dr. J to the top of the leaderboard. He’s still tracking the NL East pennant race closer than the World Cup…in fact, he’s probably spends more time pouring over his 401k statements each week than keeping up with this. |
#2 The Mandarin | 14 pts | Tying with ‘Puter for the most points with this last set of games, The Mandarin jumps up to second place with Belgium and Russia continuing to win and Nigeria and Portgual showing up stronger in their second games. |
#3 ‘Puter | 12 pts | ‘Puter sat in front of his TV all weekend and willed his picks into a record setting 9 points (tying with Mandy). Mexico continues to win. Spain and Senegal add a win each. |
#4 GorT | 10 pts | England is powering GorT’s team right now…and with the performance they had, he might be ok. Brazil grabs a win. |
#5 Volgi | 7 points | Japan and Denmark add two draws to Volgi’s score bumping him up two points. |
#6 Czar | 4 points | The Czar’s teams, frustrated with his ignoring, took the weekend off and netted ZERO points with this latest set of games. Somewhere in the castle, ‘Puter screamed, “Suck It, Czar” |
#7 Sleestak | 2 points | Sleestak climbs out of the basement with Germany’s win. |
#7 Dat Ho | 0 points | Egypt isn’t going to get Dat Ho anywhere in this league…still |
GorT is an eight-foot-tall robot from the 51ˢᵗ Century who routinely time-travels to steal expensive technology from the future and return it to the past for retroinvention. The profits from this pay all the Gormogons’ bills, including subsidizing this website. Some of the products he has introduced from the future include oven mitts, the Guinness widget, Oxy-Clean, and Dr. Pepper. Due to his immense cybernetic brain, GorT is able to produce a post in 0.023 seconds and research it in even less time. Only ’Puter spends less time on research. GorT speaks entirely in zeros and ones, but occasionally throws in a ڭ to annoy the Volgi. He is a massive proponent of science, technology, and energy development, and enjoys nothing more than taking the Czar’s more interesting scientific theories, going into the past, publishing them as his own, and then returning to take credit for them. He is the only Gormogon who is capable of doing math. Possessed of incredible strength, he understands the awesome responsibility that follows and only uses it to hurt people.