The Czar seems to be enjoying the Olympics this time around more than in recent years. And he knows why.
No, it isn’t the hysterical hypocrisy of the Opening Ceremonies lecturing us on environmentalism when Brazil is burning down its rain forests to distract from its fatally toxic drinking water. It’s not even the stomach-churning injuries that seem to be happening, resulting in sudden upsets.
The coverage is better.Of course the Czar does not mean NBC’s coverage, which remains disgusting. Why, the Czar watched this morning as three female commentators slathered lube all over the Tongan athelete. Why, if three men did that to a female, there’d be nothing but screeching; but NBC thought it was okay to reverse the sexism there. In between the constant mispronunciation of Portuguese (it’s a phonetic language, and correctly speaking the names takes about ten minutes of practice, total), to Bob Costas’ incessant lecturing about how we should know things that he himself is reading off a teleprompter for the first time, and the increasingly senile Tom Brokaw putting together a 4th-Grade video essay on the Amazon River, it’s no surprise that this Olympics will probably continue on its downward ratings trajectory. It’s terrible.
But for Comcast customers, there’s an alternative. The Царица discovered early Saturday morning that if she pushes the ‘C’ button on the remote, it brings up a list of all Olympic events going on at that moment, whether or not televised by NBC. Select a sport that’s listed, and Comcast streams you live coverage from the Internet, with no Bob Costas. We watched the men’s team archery, narrated by Australians, and it was sublime.
Word must have been catching on, because by Sunday afternoon, there were many buffering delays. A lot, actually. But watching your coverage interrupted for 5 seconds (you miss nothing when it returns, since it picks up where you left off) is an easy price to pay. And when that was over, we switched to dressage.
Comcast has finally done something exactly right by its users, and the Czar nods his approval.
Update: Operative B writes in to advise that DirecTV is offering a similar streaming option, proving the carriers understand viewers’ frustrationsxwith NBC. Bravo, B!
Божію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia upon the death of Boris Mikhailovich, who replaced Alexander Yaroslav Nevsky in 1263. However, in 1283, our Czar was passed over due to a clerical error and the rule of all Russia went to his second cousin Daniil (Даниил Александрович), whom Czar still resents. As a half-hearted apology, the Czar was awarded control over Muscovy, inconveniently located 5,000 miles away just outside Chicago. He now spends his time seething about this and writing about other stuff that bothers him.