‘Puter’s waited until now to weigh in on the mess in Ferguson, Missouri. ‘Puter had hoped that a bit of distance between a white police officer’s shooting of an unarmed young black man would enable cooler heads to prevail. However, America’s polarized politics and being what they are, no such luck.
Here’s ‘Puter’s take on the asshattery that is Ferguson, which overlaps a bit with Czar’s thoughts below.
- No one except the cop and the deceased knows with any certainty what occurred in the fateful minutes before and during the shooting. Anyone claiming otherwise is a moron.
- Brown’s alleged robbery of a liquor store minutes before his death may not be legally relevant, but it is certainly relevant to the narrative. Specifically, media had begun to fashion a narrative that Brown was a “gentle giant” and college student who wouldn’t harm a fly. The videotape showed media for the biased hacks they are.
- Similarly, the disclosure that Brown, whose loot from the alleged liquor store robbery included a box of blunts, had marijuana in his system is relevant. It’s relevant to disprove the preferred narrative media had been carefully shaping. It’s irrelevant as to whether or not Brown’s shooting is justified. Simply because someone may or may not have been stoned at the time of one’s shooting doesn’t make the shooting more or less justified.
- Concerns about overly militarized police forces are legitimate, particularly in small to middling towns. MRAPs may be necessary in New York and Los Angeles, but ‘Puter’s fairly certain Ferguson doesn’t need them. If Ferguson needs MRAPs, nearby St. Louis can oblige, or even the national guard.
- Americans are no longer able to exercise skepticism and rationality, as proven by the immediate retreat to their favored narratives. On the Left, we immediately heard “Racism!” On the right, “Criminals get shot!” Not all people reacted in this manner, but far too many did.
- Social media has affected traditional media’s ability to control a narrative, which is a good thing. In this case, however, social media got facts wrong (repeatedly), continues to repeat discredited “facts,” and allows anonymous inflammatory comments. Like most technology, social media is a blessing and a curse, and which of these it is depends on the user wielding it.
- Brown’s shooting death and the subsequent riots are two separate issues. That is, whether or not the shooting was justified does has no bearing on the legitimacy of the riots and looting. If Brown’s shooting was not justified, the cop should spend his life in prison. If the Brown shooting was justified, the cop should go free with apologies from all who have leaped to conclusions. In either case, riots are not acceptable responses.
- It is one of government’s first jobs to maintain and enforce rule of law. Riots are a direct threat to that rule of law, and undermine the foundation of our society. As such, rioters should be dealt with as what they are: enemies of the state. Rioters who refuse orders to disperse immediately should be shot on sight.
- Rioters are morons in that they destroy valuable goods and services in their own community, making such goods and services either unavailable or higher priced in order to account for the increased risk of providing goods and services to a riot prone community.
- The Ferguson rioters are Exhibit A for the Second Amendment’s continuing necessity. Cops are unable to be everywhere at once, and even when present in Ferguson, cops refused to stop the looting. In times of strife such as those in Ferguson, it is essential that Americans be able to defend themselves and their families with deadly force.
- America’s professional race-baiting hucksters (e.g., Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson) barged into a volatile situation and made it worse than it had to be, all for the sake of personal enrichment. For that alone, may they rot in Hell.
- Ferguson has shown Obama’s Administration to be what it is, a paper tiger feared by no one, dedicated to prolonging America’s racial divisions by inserting itself unnecessarily into a controversy that is Missouri’s sole responsibility. If you don’t believe ‘Puter, note that Missouri governor Jay Nixon (a Democrat) didn’t even feel the need to tell President Obama (another Democrat) that he was deploying the national guard in Ferguson. That’s a display of contempt by Nixon for Obama, a weak leader.
So, where do ‘Puter’s thoughts leave us?
‘Puter finds himself in just about the same place as he started. ‘Puter doesn’t yet have sufficient information to determine whether or not the cop’s shooting of Michael Brown was justified. ‘Puter’s going to continue to wait for the facts to come in, and then he’ll make an informed decision.
Always right, unless he isn’t, the infallible Ghettoputer F. X. Gormogons claims to be an in-law of the Volgi, although no one really believes this.
’Puter carefully follows economic and financial trends, legal affairs, and serves as the Gormogons’ financial and legal advisor. He successfully defended us against a lawsuit from a liquor distributor worth hundreds of thousands of dollars in unpaid deliveries of bootleg shandies.
The Geep has an IQ so high it is untestable and attempts to measure it have resulted in dangerously unstable results as well as injuries to researchers. Coincidentally, he publishes intelligence tests as a side gig.
His sarcasm is so highly developed it borders on the psychic, and he is often able to insult a person even before meeting them. ’Puter enjoys hunting small game with 000 slugs and punt guns, correcting homilies in real time at Mass, and undermining unions. ’Puter likes to wear a hockey mask and carry an axe into public campgrounds, where he bursts into people’s tents and screams. As you might expect, he has been shot several times but remains completely undeterred.
He assures us that his obsessive fawning over news stories involving women teachers sleeping with young students is not Freudian in any way, although he admits something similar once happened to him. Uniquely, ’Puter is unable to speak, read, or write Russian, but he is able to sing it fluently.
Geep joined the order in the mid-1980s. He arrived at the Castle door with dozens of steamer trunks and an inarticulate hissing creature of astonishingly low intelligence he calls “Sleestak.” Ghettoputer appears to make his wishes known to Sleestak, although no one is sure whether this is the result of complex sign language, expert body posture reading, or simply beating Sleestak with a rubber mallet.
‘Puter suggests the Czar suck it.