‘Puter thinks this op-ed in the New York Post today is exactly right. An Obama presidency, with the quick passage of the misnamed Employee Free Choice Act, would be devastating to small businesses nationwide. And ‘Puter’s Washington contacts (seriously) confirm that one of the first orders of business for Congress under an Obama administration will be to pass the EFCA.
As the op-ed notes, the EFCA takes away an individual worker’s right to a secret ballot, and gives the union attempting to organize the upper hand over management. This is nothing more than a Democrat sop to its moneybag unions, intended to tilt the playing field in order to reverse the natural demise of unions in the private sector. Private sector unions are failing because employees are choosing not to have them, fearing fatally harming their employers’ ability to innovate and grow. Public sector unions thrive because there is no competition forcing government efficiency.
If you, reader, want your private industry (think grocery and department stores) to be as efficient and customer focused as your local Department of Motor Vehicles, then by all means vote for Sen. Obama.
Assuming an Obama win, the next 4 to 8 years ought to be an object lesson in how to ruin an economy by imposing socialist diktats. How about this for a campaign slogan? Obama: bringing government efficiency to the private sector since 2008.
Always right, unless he isn’t, the infallible Ghettoputer F. X. Gormogons claims to be an in-law of the Volgi, although no one really believes this.
’Puter carefully follows economic and financial trends, legal affairs, and serves as the Gormogons’ financial and legal advisor. He successfully defended us against a lawsuit from a liquor distributor worth hundreds of thousands of dollars in unpaid deliveries of bootleg shandies.
The Geep has an IQ so high it is untestable and attempts to measure it have resulted in dangerously unstable results as well as injuries to researchers. Coincidentally, he publishes intelligence tests as a side gig.
His sarcasm is so highly developed it borders on the psychic, and he is often able to insult a person even before meeting them. ’Puter enjoys hunting small game with 000 slugs and punt guns, correcting homilies in real time at Mass, and undermining unions. ’Puter likes to wear a hockey mask and carry an axe into public campgrounds, where he bursts into people’s tents and screams. As you might expect, he has been shot several times but remains completely undeterred.
He assures us that his obsessive fawning over news stories involving women teachers sleeping with young students is not Freudian in any way, although he admits something similar once happened to him. Uniquely, ’Puter is unable to speak, read, or write Russian, but he is able to sing it fluently.
Geep joined the order in the mid-1980s. He arrived at the Castle door with dozens of steamer trunks and an inarticulate hissing creature of astonishingly low intelligence he calls “Sleestak.” Ghettoputer appears to make his wishes known to Sleestak, although no one is sure whether this is the result of complex sign language, expert body posture reading, or simply beating Sleestak with a rubber mallet.
‘Puter suggests the Czar suck it.