‘Puter feels like singing. He’s had that one song from “The LEGO Movie” stuck in his head all morning. You know the one. It goes like this:
All you guys are racist! All you guys are tools because you’re not on our team! All you guys are racist! When you question our schemes!
At least that’s how ‘Puter think it goes. ‘Puter’s pretty sure he’s heard Democrats, media, and the establishment sing it this way for years.
Which brings ‘Puter to the point of this post, the Capitol riots. Earlier today, ‘Puter posted a far-too-long thread on Twitter, writing off the top of pointy little pinhead as ‘Puter is wont to do. GorT saw ‘Puter’s rabid screed, liked it, and informed ‘Puter he must post it on our blog. This is ‘Puter’s weak attempt at recreating that thread’s chaos using mostly complete sentences, close enough for government work grammar, and random punctuation.
The word has gone out from the Biden transition team* to Democrats’ lickspittle propagandists in media. The official establishment narrative regarding the Capitol Riot is that Trump-supporting “white supremacists” are solely responsible.
‘Puter has thoughts.
If media (and thus the Democrats and the Washington establishment (both Democrats and Republicans) because media is little more than a transmission method for Democrats’ preferred narrative printed verbatim from copy provided by Democrats) thinks “white supremacy” caused the Capitol Riot, media is sorely mistaken.**
‘Puter is certain he better groks the Capitol riot’s causes better than media. And not just because ‘Puter was smart enough to not become a media member, the last refuge of the people too stupid to get into the Peace Corps and too ugly to be strippers. Let harmlessly pervy ‘Puter break it down for you all. Pull up a chair, grab yourself a beer, and heed as the ‘Puter tells his tale.
As some of you may have noticed, DME spent the last four or five decades pissing on Middle America, blue collar workers, and the poor. If we’re being honest, DME focused its steaming stream of asparagus-stank urine mostly on Middle America, white Middle America to be more specific.
Middle America is not, despite DME articles of faith, full of subhuman mongoloids wandering the land, pausing only to produce food for the coastal elites, to spit out replacement subhuman mongoloids, and to worship their weird sky-god Jeebus or whatever his name is. ‘Puter knows. ‘Puter has lived there.
Believe it or not, some people in Middle America went to the same or better universities as their DME betters. Some of these Middle Americans even did better than their DME betters, in part because our DME betters are entitled jerks so convinced of their inherent superiority they don’t bother to work. Other Middle Americans are normal working people with normal dreams, normal needs, normal families, and above-normal bullshit detectors. In short, Middle America is smart enough to have noticed media’s warm, yellow torrent falling on it from above and does not much appreciate it.
This is the baseline from which DME should have started its “root cause” analysis of the Capitol Riot.*** But the DME doesn’t know (or even care that it doesn’t know) what it doesn’t know about Middle America.
For decades, let’s say Bill Clinton’s first term through George W. Bush’s last term, Middle America grinned and bore it as DME outsourced their jobs, restricted their gun rights, mocked their faiths, destroyed their cities, tarred them as racists, sent their sons and daughters to endless wars for undefined goals, and sat idly by as opioids, alcohol, and despair slowly killed them. DME did all this while explaining that everything that was undermining the foundation of their communities was for their own good and the good of the country.
Middle America grew disenchanted with globalism and military adventurism. Middle America learned to distrust politicians of both parties. Middle America looked around at what their faith in America and its political system had gotten them.**** And Middle America said softly to itself, “F*ck this shit.”
Then came 2008 and “the first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy” to run for president.***** Obama came promising “hope and change” and that America would move “forward.” Obama neglected to mention that he would govern from the left and disdained the “bitter clingers” (later renamed “deplorables” by Democrats’ worst candidate since McGovern) who make up Middle America. Middle America swallowed hard, gave it one more shot, and voted for Obama.
Their faith in Obama’s promise of “hope and change” was short lived. Obama proceeded to let China run rampant over the US economy, breaching trade agreements, stealing trade secrets, and enticing formerly American jobs to the People’s Republic of Xi Jinping. Obama destroyed Middle America’s health insurance with Obamacare because f*ck you hicks, elections have consequences. Obama continued America’s disastrous military adventurism without apology, abandoning his election promises to bring the troops home. Things got bleaker for Middle America.
And then Obama, in a triumph of hope over experience, and with a giant assist from media who painted Mitt Romney, the most milquetoast and moderate Republican of all time, as the second coming of Hitler with a magic wand that gave women cancer and subsequent painful deaths, got reelected in 2012, this time with less support from Middle America.
During Obama’s first term, around 2009, the Tea Party was birthed. The Tea Party was Middle America’s attempt to make (mostly) Republicans actually govern as they ran and as Republicans should. DME immediately recognized this as the threat it was and unleashed the hounds, using a combination of IRS abuse and media lies to marginalize the Tea Party. This was the moment Middle America had had enough.
Middle America was ripe for a populist revolt. Hell, the Tea Party was the *polite and in-bounds* Middle America populist revolt. And Republicans, Democrats, and media completely missed it. Trump did not.
Trump corralled and nurtured this discontent. He courted disaffected Middle Americans’ votes for the first time in a generation or two. Trump dared listen to Middle America’s concerns. Trump heard what Middle America wanted and promised to give it to them. All Middle America had to do was the impossible: get a jackass narcissist from Queens elected president.
And thus Trump became one of the approximately 1,193 Republicans vying for the 2016 Republican nomination, the orange man with the canary hair descending his tacky gold escalator into the hearts of Middle America, millions of whom would become Trump’s base.
No member of the DME thought Trump had a chance to win the Republican nomination much less the presidency. Neither did I. At least at first.
As it became apparent this one-man clownshow with no political experience had Republican candidates on their heels, the DME shifted tactics. The DME decided to do everything it could to help Trump win the Republican nomination. Enter Morning Joe’s adulterous tag team of screamingly liberal Mika Brzezinski and her slightly less liberal side piece and former conservative Joe Scarborough. The Morning Joe team, ostensibly in pursuit of giving Hillary Clinton (hereinafter, “Meemaw Winebox”) the easiest road to the presidency ever, gave Trump all the free airtime he wanted. Trump would literally call into the show unannounced from his penthouse and Joe and Mika would put him on the air, no questions asked. This went on for months. And the DME’s plan worked, or so they thought.
But an interesting thing happened, as interesting things do. This forgotten Middle America, this frequently shat-upon-by-DME-“elites” group of Flyover Country human flotsam dragged Trump into the Oval Office by his fabulous mane.
The DME was shocked. And ‘Puter means shocked. The pictures of the weeping women in the Javits Center, absolutely shattered that Bad Orange Man could’ve possibly bested the world’s most accomplished excuser of serial adultery who couldn’t find Wisconsin on a map of Wisconsin. Every single media outlet (with the exceptions of Fox and the Wall Street Journal) lost their ever-loving minds that night and have yet to recover them.
This is the moment when the road to the Capitol Riot was paved. Within hours of Trump’s election, the DME set out to ruin him. There would be no punches pulled, no holds barred. The word went out from on high that media was to torch what little remained of its credibility to cripple Trump’s administration and to deny a duly elected president the opportunity to govern.
The word went out to resist. From the thousands of hairy hippie Boomers wasting their last years in stupid pussyhats marching on Washington to the DME backed antifa rioters at Trump’s inauguration to the media opinionators who spilled ink like blood at Antietam in comical denunciations of a man who’d done exactly nothing yet, the game was afoot.
Unbeknownst to America at the time, Obama and Biden ordered the federal government to get started on destroying Trump and his incoming team before the 2016 election was even held.
Middle America watched and learned.
They learned the DME didn’t mean it when they said if Middle America wanted things change, win an election and change things. They took Obama at his word, “Elections have consequences.” Middle America’s candidate, Trump, won the election. The DME refused to let Middle America win. Middle America learned the cake is a lie.
That is, DME doesn’t believe in democracy any more than most of them believe in God, Western values’ supremacy, our Constitution, or our democratic republic. The DME believes in only in power: gaining it, keeping it, and defending it.
Middle America learned that DME would do *anything* including but not limited to lying, jettisoning their credibility, violating laws, ignoring the Constitution, and encouraging “resistance” (which is gee dee close to insurrection, in ‘Puter’s opinion) to keep themselves in control and in power.
But a funny thing happened. As the DME worked its chaos, things got better for Middle America. Much better. Trump’s economy improved because his instinct that government interference in business was bad and should be pared back. Trump’s instinct was correct. Middle America, the poor, and *minorities* did radically better under Trump than Obama, even though the DME continued saying Trump was a racist who led his racist supporters to do racist things. The DME’s problem was and is that Middle America and minorities have eyes and ears and can judge for themselves.
Amidst the continued chaos, some of it purely self-inflicted, Trump with Sen. McConnell’s help appointed conservative judges, got three conservatives on the Supreme Court (poor, dead, noted conservative Merrick Garland was not one of these). This did not go over well with the DME as it is forever and always their sole right to determine the makeup of the Supreme Court.
Naturally, Pelosi and her merry bunch of idiots in the House impeached Trump on the basis of a thoroughly discredited Russian dossier, produced by Meemaw Winebox’s failed, inept campaign, and leaked to media by the DME with instructions to push a narrative they knew or should have known to be false. This moment steeled Middle America’s nerve, an unjust, undeserved, unproven impeachment of Trump for no other reason than to damage him.
Between the DME’s garbage impeachment (the first one, not the current one, though the current one was far too speedy to provide any meaningful deliberation) and the Democrats’ purely evil behavior in the Kavanaugh hearings, the resistance/insurrection DME continued its quiet war on Trump and unintentionally on government legitimacy.
The DME sounded the war horn, calling their unthinking hordes to battle on social media and across America’s cities. Drag the DME’s chosen placeholder across the threshold of the Oval Office or surely Trump and his racist, white supremacist minions will kill all of us and make us all LARP The Handmaid’s Tale or something. And come the DME’s horde did.
The horde came to dox on social media. The horde came to cancel in board rooms and places of employ. The horde came to riot, burn and loot in America’s cities. Middle America watched as the DME not only let the loonies run rampant but encouraged and excused the horde’s worst excesses.
The horde demanded government “defund the police.” The horde demanded abolition of the Electoral College. The horde demanded the DME pack the Supreme Court because of the injustice of it being conservative for the first time since the Great Depression. The horde demanded a job-killing, government-power-maximizing Green New Deal. The horde elected avowed socialists to Congress, idiots whose politics will surely lead to the disintegration of American society. In short, the DME commanded its horde to create a crisis.
Meanwhile, a weird new virus in China appeared and spread like wildfire through a Chinese city few Americans had heard of before. Trump wanted to shut America’s borders. The DME called him a racist bigot and refused to let him do so. Not content to limit its chants of “racist” to Trump, the DME and its horde branded all Trump’s supporters as racist, white supremacist xenophobes.
When the ‘ronas arrived in New York City and people started dropping like flies, the DME shat on Trump for *not* closing the borders, as one does, in a brilliant display of gaslighting. Naturally, media covered for the DME, insisting that a pandemic possibly unleashed by China (wittingly or unwittingly) from a biological warfare lab in Wuhan was fully Trump’s fault. And media coverage when downhill from there.
Never one to “let a good crisis go to waste,” the DME insisted all of America be shut down, crippling Trump’s booming economy. The DME insisted at first that we “flatten the curve” but that quickly morphed into “do nothing until a vaccine is available,” which has now become “do nothing until everyone is fully vaccinated and we have ten year longitudinal studies of the vaccines’ effectiveness.” This is what the DME calls “listening to the science.”
But so-called science and scientists flat out lied to America. The ‘ronas are no big deal, kind of like the flu. You don’t need to wear masks. The virus isn’t airborne. Flatten the curve. Slow the spread. Vaccines can’t be ready before the election and administered by year’s end, Trump’s lying.
Even assuming Fauci and others were merely wrong, they never apologized or explained. If they did, media didn’t cover and the lying liars who lie never repeated their apologies.
Not content to leave well enough alone, media lionized the shutdown king Andrew Cuomo who literally killed thousands of old people in nursing homes by requiring the homes to take infected but recovering patients back. Hell, the idiots who hand out Emmys to other idiots gave Cuomo an Emmy. Some really solid first-responding there, media. You do realize that the goal isn’t to be fireman like in Fahrenheit 451 but firemen as in run into the collapsing World Trade center firemen, right?
Then came the summer of BLM protests and riots. The DME explained away the violence, the looting, and the arsons as “the language of the unheard” patiently informing Middle Americans that they were evil racists for thinking that people burning down their businesses and stealing stuff might should be prosecuted as the criminals they are. DME elevated a Marxism-based BLM to a position of unimpeachable moral authority and decreed any negative thing said is necessarily racist regardless of the truth of such statement.
Middle America watched their cities burn. They watched Democrat governors unnecessarily and heavy-handedly shut down their small businesses. They watched their loved ones in nursing homes die unnecessary deaths of loneliness. They watched their friends, neighbors, and kids kill themselves with guns or more slowly from drugs as the loss of jobs and interaction destroy social life. They watched DME explain how science and “we’re all in this together” required such sacrifices as Democrat mayors and governors sunned themselves on Mexican beaches. Middle America watched itself being played as suckers.
Next up, after America’s Summer of Totally Not Burning, Looting, and Rioting, the elections. Because of the conveniently maintained shutdowns, Democrat-run states pushed mail in voting for all despite never having done such a thing before and not having the infrastructure to do it properly. Democrat-run states changed voting rules illegally and Democrat-controlled state courts allowed Democrat-run states to do so. Federal courts largely sat it all out.
Many Middle Americans (including me) noted that the state’s utter lack of experience with and preparation for mail in balloting practically guaranteed errors at a minimum and opportunities for widespread election fraud at worst. DME dismissed such legitimate concerns scornfully, stating the only possible reason for opposing mail in voting was a racist method of suppressing the votes of minorities. Middle America learned.
In November 2020, Trump lost the election. The DME unleashed its hordes on those of us noted the election was so unusual as to engender suspicion from the get-go. The DME’s hordes made many reasonable and sane people instant pariahs, and had them deplatformed by their Silicon Valley allies running the woke leftist social media platforms. Then the DME hordes got around to doxing people which is pure evil. And the DME said nothing. Destroying people and trust in elections is fine so long as the DME maintains power.
The DME would brook no challenge to its rule. After all, the DME has always and must always rule. If the DME believed in a god, any god, the DME would claim the Mandate of Heaven. Middle America watched and learned.
After the election, Trump to his everlasting shame unreasonably fanned the flames of Middle America’s reasonable anger. A small subset of Middle America, finally and fully fed up with the DME’s lies and nefarious deeds, stormed the Capitol, overwhelming an inexplicably unprepared security force. Some of these rioters clearly planned to storm the Capitol. Some were clearly bent on installing Trump as president for a second term. Some were armed. Some *may have been* white supremacists. It was bad. Very bad. Inexcusable.
Not content to let Trump and his supporters who stormed the Capitol burn to ashes alone, the DME decides to pour gasoline on the dumpster fire. The DME decides that clearly, the rioters were *all* white supremacists. They were *all* operating on secret orders from Trump. They were *all* evil Nazi usurpers.
Leaping off from one burning dumpster into a raging tire fire, the DME decides that because all the rioters were evil, Nazi, white supremacist, anarchist, militaristic morons from gross Flyover Country, every single last Trump supporter is as well. The DME sends word and media heeds the call. The narrative has been set.
And this brings us back to ‘Puter’s original point: the DME has fundamentally misunderstood the Capitol Riot and has done so at its and America’s peril. The Capitol Riot did not happen because of racism or white supremacy. The Capitol Riot happened because of the DME’s decades-long phenomenal arrogance and disdain for America itself and certain types of Americans.
The DME’s arrogance created the Tea Party. The DME’s arrogance created the conditions which made space in Middle America’s mind for Trump to be considered a serious presidential candidate. The DME’s arrogance (not to mention Meemaw Winebox’s breathtaking incompetence as a candidate) got Trump elected. The DME’s arrogance caused Trump’s support to hold despite all the crap and chaos Trump wrought. The Capitol Riot occurred (in part) because of the DME’s arrogance. And the fracture of America will not heal because of the DME’s continuing and unrepentant arrogance.
Middle America learned a lot about the game and its rules during Trump’s term. Middle America learned it can do whatever it wants because the DME will hate them and lie about them regardless.
Conversely, the DME has learned nothing. The DME continues to repeat its mistakes, the same mistakes which led to a fractured country, which led to Trump, and which ultimately led to the Capitol Riot.
The DME continues to shit on Trump and Trump voters. The DME continues to disregard Middle America as dog shit on the bottom of its shoe. The DME continues to drive Americans farther and farther apart. The DME continues its grift unabated. The DME is content that the end of destroying Trump was and is worth the means of destroying Americans’ faith in elections, media, politics, and government. So long as the DME remains in control and in power, it sees nothing wrong, no festering cancers, no life-ending accidents on the horizon. The DME’s overinflated self-love, disdain for half or more of Americans, and insistence that it and only it can be correct has made it blind.
It is this blindness which has caused the DME to see the Capitol Riot as a death knell when it reality it was the sharp cries of a newborn and reinvigorated populist movement. Truly, this riot was the language of the unheard.
As a prediction, because of all ‘Puter discussed above, ‘Puter wagers Biden will fail in uniting the country. The DME certainly isn’t interested in unity and Middle America knows it.
And contrary to the DME’s current belief, Middle America’s populist streak wasn’t destroyed by Trump loss. Trump may or may not continue to lead our current populist movement, but the movement and the America’s rapidly progressing disintegration will not end until the DME changes its ways.
‘Puter is not hopeful.
* ‘Puter still can’t get over Biden’s bravery for coming out as a transwoman in process of transitioning to his intended gender of Enwanged-American-Totally-Female person. And if you’re a cis-het male and refuse to ass-bang him, you’re a sexist bigot.
** For ease of reference and because ‘Puter is a lazy sack of dung who hates typing and mean people, “Democrats, media, and the establishment” will be abbreviated “DME” throughout this screed.
*** Man, do the DME types sure love them some “root cause” analyses. Root cause analysis is their second favorite “we’re pretending to care about issue x while doing absolutely nothing to solve issue x” avoidance technique. DME’s favorite avoidance technique is, of course, the hallowed “national conversation” about what’s ailing America, usually defined as “something conservatives are doing that is working and makes them look good to voters.”
**** This is as good a place as any to note that a similar trend has occurred within the Democrat base among black people. Blacks have absolutely had it and are taking no more empty promises from their politicians as we have seen in this summer’s BLM protests and accompanying riots. It’s an interesting confluence of events and a massive opportunity for the right politician or party. But this is a topic for another day.
***** Joe Biden actually said this about Barack Obama. And blacks decided that Joe Biden is totally not racist and voted him into office because … heck, I have no idea why black people did this.
Always right, unless he isn’t, the infallible Ghettoputer F. X. Gormogons claims to be an in-law of the Volgi, although no one really believes this.
’Puter carefully follows economic and financial trends, legal affairs, and serves as the Gormogons’ financial and legal advisor. He successfully defended us against a lawsuit from a liquor distributor worth hundreds of thousands of dollars in unpaid deliveries of bootleg shandies.
The Geep has an IQ so high it is untestable and attempts to measure it have resulted in dangerously unstable results as well as injuries to researchers. Coincidentally, he publishes intelligence tests as a side gig.
His sarcasm is so highly developed it borders on the psychic, and he is often able to insult a person even before meeting them. ’Puter enjoys hunting small game with 000 slugs and punt guns, correcting homilies in real time at Mass, and undermining unions. ’Puter likes to wear a hockey mask and carry an axe into public campgrounds, where he bursts into people’s tents and screams. As you might expect, he has been shot several times but remains completely undeterred.
He assures us that his obsessive fawning over news stories involving women teachers sleeping with young students is not Freudian in any way, although he admits something similar once happened to him. Uniquely, ’Puter is unable to speak, read, or write Russian, but he is able to sing it fluently.
Geep joined the order in the mid-1980s. He arrived at the Castle door with dozens of steamer trunks and an inarticulate hissing creature of astonishingly low intelligence he calls “Sleestak.” Ghettoputer appears to make his wishes known to Sleestak, although no one is sure whether this is the result of complex sign language, expert body posture reading, or simply beating Sleestak with a rubber mallet.
‘Puter suggests the Czar suck it.