One of the British princes is getting married to a former American, and thousands of Americans will be glued to the events in rapt fascination; the rest of us won’t remotely understand the appeal of this. Wasn’t despising royalty the whole point of 1776?

Meantime, the United States will feature some gun show which will be attended by a couple hundred British subjects out of thousands of American attendees; the British visitors will love putting their hands on new pistols and rifles, and happily debate the merits of one brand of ammunition over another. The rest of Britain will shake their heads in befuddlement. What’s with the fascination over firearms?

The two have that in common: a small wedge of fascination for it, with the vast majority perplexed by it.

The reason is psychologically analogous. In the United Kingdom, fascination with royalty is ingrained in the culture. We Americans, for the most part, have no clue why or even care why it works. British royalty just is, and it seems to work okay for them. No matter how much Americans scratch their head over the very concept of non-elected leaders who reign but don’t seem to actually rule, the British aren’t going to give it up. It’s part of who they are as a people.

Likewise, the exasperated tweets and Facebook posts from Brits about how stupid Americans are with their fascination with firepower…well, there it is. It’s who we are. The Second Amendment, written in America’s earliest days with a Constitution, is ingrained in our very being. We’re not going to give it up no matter how much Piers Morgan stamps his slippered foot.

Like we said, there’s a subset of Americans who love love love them their British royals, just as there are many over-the-pond gun junkies who dearly wished they had a backyard shooting range. And in America, we don’t necessarily understand that fascination, just as millions of Brits don’t get why any of their fellow countrymen and women would even know what an AR-15 is, let alone what direct impingement means.

Nothing more to it than that.

The Czar of Muscovy

Божію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia upon the death of Boris Mikhailovich, who replaced Alexander Yaroslav Nevsky in 1263. However, in 1283, our Czar was passed over due to a clerical error and the rule of all Russia went to his second cousin Daniil (Даниил Александрович), whom Czar still resents. As a half-hearted apology, the Czar was awarded control over Muscovy, inconveniently located 5,000 miles away just outside Chicago. He now spends his time seething about this and writing about other stuff that bothers him.