By the time you read this, you already will have heard 180° changes in the reporting, as to whether things happened or did not, whether certain parties were responsible or not. Predictably, the event was politicized by both sides in a manner unforgiveable. As news continued to evolve, the early jokesters and ironic wits who made sport of the event realized how bad this was becoming on Twitter, and many tweets expected to get a nodding head got a shaking head instead. Welcome to the new paradigm.

But one thing might have stuck with you: the early reassurance that the Boston Police Department already had a suspect in custody who was providing information. We have since learned that no such person existed except in the mind of another inexperienced field reporter who should be covering other events from this day forward.

Let your hopes be not dashed. The entire event was recorded from beginning to end. Authorities already know how the bombs were constructed, what materials were used, as well as the style of operation and precisely where they were positioned. The bomb maker may have experience and might even be competent to a degree, but was sloppy enough to leave no end of clues.

The Czar will go one further: not only will investigators identify and catch the monster who did this, but some of them probably have a pretty good idea who it was. Maybe they have not articulated his name aloud, and they likely have nothing more than a hunch, but they have already connected enough dots to begin asking questions that will lead them to the answer.

Authorities may already have him. However, it will take at least two people to pull off a multiple bombing (even if one guy did all the work, there will be a planner and coordinator) and law enforcement may be playing it low key (“No suspects at this time”) to pinpoint the second guy’s whereabouts. But like the 1993 World Trade Center bombing, they will succeed on this one. There are too many clues left.

The Czar of Muscovy

Божію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia upon the death of Boris Mikhailovich, who replaced Alexander Yaroslav Nevsky in 1263. However, in 1283, our Czar was passed over due to a clerical error and the rule of all Russia went to his second cousin Daniil (Даниил Александрович), whom Czar still resents. As a half-hearted apology, the Czar was awarded control over Muscovy, inconveniently located 5,000 miles away just outside Chicago. He now spends his time seething about this and writing about other stuff that bothers him.