On the Ninth Day of Christmas
…the Gormogons gave to me:
eight sex milking hits
five Gor-mo-gons
four bags of mail
three Guest Spots
two Boxing Days
and a Hello Kitty in an orange tree
Of course everyone is expecting this post to be about our resident Czar and his amazing dancing abilities. The real secret here is that he practices for hours screaming at Dat Ho to put the needle back on the record. It truly astounds the rest of us here at the Castle how the Czar can be so well informed and post so often with the amount of dancing he does. But then again, I digress. This post is really about some other dancing Czars, ones that our Czar isn’t too fond of. Courtesy of RBO, I give you Obama’s dancing Czars:
Back Row (L to R): Van Jones, Green Jobs; Cass Sunstein; Regulatory; Adolpho Carrien, Urban; Josh DuBois, Faith; Carol Browner, Energy*.
Front Row (L to R): Elizabeth Warren, TARP Oversite; Nancy-Ann DePurle, Health Reform; Kenneth Feinburg, Salary, Pay & Compensation; Vivek Kundra, Info Tech/Information
The democrats in congress have blocked all efforts by the GOP to even question what are these people’s jobs, responsibilities and authority. It is my opinion that Obama has done this in a savvy manner – when things fail in a particular area, he has an instant scapegoat. Of course, the buy out for these people to take a fall will be significant too – but probably not investigated by the Regulation Czar or the Salary, Pay & Compensation Czar.
* I took a little liberty with the source image and chopped one Czar out to make nine.
GorT is an eight-foot-tall robot from the 51ˢᵗ Century who routinely time-travels to steal expensive technology from the future and return it to the past for retroinvention. The profits from this pay all the Gormogons’ bills, including subsidizing this website. Some of the products he has introduced from the future include oven mitts, the Guinness widget, Oxy-Clean, and Dr. Pepper. Due to his immense cybernetic brain, GorT is able to produce a post in 0.023 seconds and research it in even less time. Only ’Puter spends less time on research. GorT speaks entirely in zeros and ones, but occasionally throws in a ڭ to annoy the Volgi. He is a massive proponent of science, technology, and energy development, and enjoys nothing more than taking the Czar’s more interesting scientific theories, going into the past, publishing them as his own, and then returning to take credit for them. He is the only Gormogon who is capable of doing math. Possessed of incredible strength, he understands the awesome responsibility that follows and only uses it to hurt people.