GorT is an eight-foot-tall robot from the 51ˢᵗ Century who routinely time-travels to steal expensive technology from the future and return it to the past for retroinvention. The profits from this pay all the Gormogons’ bills, including subsidizing this website. Some of the products he has introduced from the future include oven mitts, the Guinness widget, Oxy-Clean, and Dr. Pepper. Due to his immense cybernetic brain, GorT is able to produce a post in 0.023 seconds and research it in even less time. Only ’Puter spends less time on research. GorT speaks entirely in zeros and ones, but occasionally throws in a ڭ to annoy the Volgi. He is a massive proponent of science, technology, and energy development, and enjoys nothing more than taking the Czar’s more interesting scientific theories, going into the past, publishing them as his own, and then returning to take credit for them. He is the only Gormogon who is capable of doing math. Possessed of incredible strength, he understands the awesome responsibility that follows and only uses it to hurt people.
Case in point: The Obama Administration with help from their friends in Hollywood, decided that a gift appropriate for his first meeting with the British Prime Minister would be a set of 25 DVDs. Sure, the gift was lame and Mark Steyn points out that the British PM has vision problems which make the gift even less appropriate. But, wait there’s more. The Gormogon power was brought to bear and the truth comes out: The 25 DVDs are region 1 encoded, so what did Mr. Brown see upon playing one? Yep, the one shown here. How amateurish can this administration get? Did no one think about this? It’s the FIRST THING you do on your DVD player. And you would think that this would be easy fodder for Colbert, Stewart, etc. GorT is available to help with your NCAA Brackets…but of course, apparently the President is too. However, one of us has a proven track record on prognostication lately.