GorT took a look at some of the speakers set for the DNC:
Sandra Fluke – so a 30-something law student who believes that free birth control for all should be a major platform issue for the Presidency is speaking. Prediction: she’s going to whine and complain and sound like a warped Alanis Morissette song….my apologies to Alanis Morissette.
Lilly Ledbetter, the namesake of the federal law requiring equal pay for equal work regardless of gender. I wonder if she’ll ask the DNC delegates to investigate why their candidate’s campaign doesn’t pay men and women staffers the same for the same level of work? Probably not. Maybe she’ll ask the Senate Democrats why they don’t pay their male and female staffers the same for the same level of work? I doubt it.
Nancy Keenan, head of NARAL Pro-Choice America, will speak. Maybe to defend why President Obama voted in favor of the partial-birth abortions four times while saying that he wants to find a middle ground.
Caroline Kennedy will speak – maybe to complain that the current set f democrats allowed Teddy’s seat to be turned over to a Republican. The horrors! ELEVENTY!@!@$$!!@#
Eva Longoria will speak about something. Maybe how awesome Desperate Housewives is…or was. Or maybe how great she is in that new pick a flavor of Lay’s Potato Chips ad. Corndog? Seriously?
It doesn’t get much better…
The wooden-one, John Kerry will speak and Maryland’s own Martin O’Malley, who unlike the republican governors that BG pointed out, took a state budget surplus from his Republican predecessor and now has us in a solid deficit. Rahm Emanuel will be there to drop some F-bombs and curse at people.
Both Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid will talk. I can’t wait for those two. Pelosi will probably avoid defending the “most open, honest, and ethical Congress EVAH!” and Harry Reid will likely avoid anything budgetary as he hasn’t passed on in over three years.
Clearly, the democrats are trying to draw a distinction between their platforms as it affects women. While not of the fairer sex, GorT is pretty sure that the jobs and the economy are more important to women and the straight-talking, taking care of business type of women that the RNC featured. Cases in point here.
GorT is an eight-foot-tall robot from the 51ˢᵗ Century who routinely time-travels to steal expensive technology from the future and return it to the past for retroinvention. The profits from this pay all the Gormogons’ bills, including subsidizing this website. Some of the products he has introduced from the future include oven mitts, the Guinness widget, Oxy-Clean, and Dr. Pepper. Due to his immense cybernetic brain, GorT is able to produce a post in 0.023 seconds and research it in even less time. Only ’Puter spends less time on research. GorT speaks entirely in zeros and ones, but occasionally throws in a ڭ to annoy the Volgi. He is a massive proponent of science, technology, and energy development, and enjoys nothing more than taking the Czar’s more interesting scientific theories, going into the past, publishing them as his own, and then returning to take credit for them. He is the only Gormogon who is capable of doing math. Possessed of incredible strength, he understands the awesome responsibility that follows and only uses it to hurt people.