First, The Democrats Came For The Rich …
We are each familiar with Martin Niemoller’s famous quote (even though he likely never said those actual words), so there’s no need to reprint it here.
Niemoller’s quote came to ‘Puter’s feeble mind as he mulled over the Democrats’ latest “fair share” soak-the-rich class warfare strategy. The Democrats are betting that Americans are as passive as the early Nazi-era German populace, because the Democrats’ constituency won’t be effected by their “Tax and redistribute” policy. Yet.
‘Puter sees the omens. Elizabeth Warren’s quotation, making the rounds in the blogosphere. The Washington liberal commentariat’s fawning adulation, epitomized by White House stooge E.J. Dionne. The Democrats are going all in on a redistributionist strategy, packaged in the feel good, PC horse-shit wrapping paper of “justice” and “fairness.”
So here’s ‘Puter’s reconfiguration of Niemoller’s quote, which he believes appropriately identifies the looming hazard should we fail to kill this idea now.
First the Democrats came for the Rich, and I did not speak out — Because I was not Rich.
Then the Democrats came for the Wall Street Fat Cats, and I did not speak out — Because I was not a Wall Street Fat Cat.
Then the Democrats came for the my neighbor the Small Businessman, and I did not speak out — Because I was not a Small Businessman.
Then they came for me — and there was no one left to speak for me.
The millions of Americans who are standing idly by, passively permitting the Democrats to redistribute others’ wealth in the name of “fairness,” will awake one morning soon to find that the Democrats have come for their wealth, because there is no wealth left for them to steal from others.
And that, my friends, is what the Democrats are really all about, despite their fervid claims otherwise.
Always right, unless he isn’t, the infallible Ghettoputer F. X. Gormogons claims to be an in-law of the Volgi, although no one really believes this.
’Puter carefully follows economic and financial trends, legal affairs, and serves as the Gormogons’ financial and legal advisor. He successfully defended us against a lawsuit from a liquor distributor worth hundreds of thousands of dollars in unpaid deliveries of bootleg shandies.
The Geep has an IQ so high it is untestable and attempts to measure it have resulted in dangerously unstable results as well as injuries to researchers. Coincidentally, he publishes intelligence tests as a side gig.
His sarcasm is so highly developed it borders on the psychic, and he is often able to insult a person even before meeting them. ’Puter enjoys hunting small game with 000 slugs and punt guns, correcting homilies in real time at Mass, and undermining unions. ’Puter likes to wear a hockey mask and carry an axe into public campgrounds, where he bursts into people’s tents and screams. As you might expect, he has been shot several times but remains completely undeterred.
He assures us that his obsessive fawning over news stories involving women teachers sleeping with young students is not Freudian in any way, although he admits something similar once happened to him. Uniquely, ’Puter is unable to speak, read, or write Russian, but he is able to sing it fluently.
Geep joined the order in the mid-1980s. He arrived at the Castle door with dozens of steamer trunks and an inarticulate hissing creature of astonishingly low intelligence he calls “Sleestak.” Ghettoputer appears to make his wishes known to Sleestak, although no one is sure whether this is the result of complex sign language, expert body posture reading, or simply beating Sleestak with a rubber mallet.
‘Puter suggests the Czar suck it.