A decent Saturday afternoon. Four-and-a-half acres of wooded, private property. Decent beer. Hot dogs cooked over a five-foot fire pit. We taught a group of kids how to display and fold a flag correctly; Царевич and his buddy did the best—nice and tight triangles; he also helped start the fire, and we took advantage of it to teach the kids how to retire an old flag respectfully. The Czar so happened to have one handy they could fold and retire.

The Czar had a conversation with his neighbor that consisted of the following topics:

  • Liquor
  • Football
  • Shotguns
  • Why axes and mauls are better than chainsaws and log splitters
  • Proper fire-building techniques
  • Cooking over fires

The kids amused themselves on a trampoline and a tent (which they learned how to put together).

All in all, a remarkably nice day. And now off to the Mandarin’s private estate where we celebrate his boy’s amazing 11th birthday. Dare the Czar suggest we are in a most excellent mood today?

About The Czar of Muscovy

Божію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia by upon the death of Boris Mikhailovich, who replaced Alexander Yaroslav Nevsky in 1263. However, in 1283, our Czar was passed over due to a clerical error and the rule of all Russia went to his second cousin Daniil (Даниил Александрович), whom Czar still resents. As a half-hearted apology, the Czar was awarded control over Muscovy, inconveniently located 5,000 miles away just outside Chicago. He now spends his time seething about this and writing about other stuff that bothers him.