Ah, hippies. They just can’t let it go.

When you’re a loser who was never forced to hear anything sensible, and you experience a long period lacking in self-discipline and with zero social consequences—say the years 1966-1977—you tend to pine for that period when reality keeps pimp slapping you.

Hippies hate when reality does this to them. Like any battered wife, they will just have to try harder to make everything even better this time. Hell is, of course, expecting different results but hippies have always existed in their own hell.

And so God how they miss that era. So much so, that when they became old enough to move into the top tiers of the recording industry, you wind up with countless remakes of songs from their youth, but with disco beats. You can hear a boy band on the radio probably right now re-doing a Blondie song.

Clothing, too. As they moved into the fashion world, you wind up with Daisy Dukes, bell bottoms, tie-die, and long, straight hair on girls and long, unkempt hair on boys. Hang out at high schools, as ‘Puter is wont to do, and you could be at Smoke Valley High, 1973.

Look at retro cars: the Mustang, Camaro, Challenger, Charger…all back with styling cues from that era. Because, again, the hippies are old enough to have management positions in art and marketing departments.

Know where you don’t see hippies? Anywhere where personally accountability rules. You don’t see them in banking, finance, or trading in large numbers, advocating high interest rates, free toasters with new accounts, and charge accounts. No surprise: they would have been fired. But anywhere you see accountability dismissed as out-moded, you will find hippies.

Like all over government! Look how they have crawled out of their hidey-holes to join the man! Of course, now it isn’t the man—Eisenhower and Kennedy, specifically. No, the man is now one of them! Radicals thought in 2008 they have a clear victory, and they became bureaucrats, directors, under-secretaries, and all sorts of decision makers by the thousands. If you are a hippie who wants to relive the glory days of Watergate killing the GOP, endless social welfare giveaways, and environmental protests…hell, there’s no happier place than in Washington.

A curious corollary: one bizarre piece of history may have been forgotten by you younger folks. In the late 1960s, and well into the early 1970s, hippies were always looking to blacks as their personal project. The blacks were put into inner cities, given their own schools and buses, and still things were bad for them. So hippies began to sympathize with what they perceived black culture to be: the Panthers, the Black Islam, and Black Power.

In other words, the very worst of black American culture. And this is doubtless due to inherent racism; see, hippies were not among the working poor of this country, but the children of middle class and upper middle class parents who were overly indulgent. These kids had little exposure to blacks outside of characters on television, and when meeting them for the first time in colleges and universities…well, they white hippie kids naturally assumed the angry, radical, violent blacks there were “their kind,” with the dropping out, the drugs, the rebellion, and moreover this talk of revolution.

We know how it turned out, but we forget that hippies had a very warped view of race that revolved around black America rebelling and revolting against white whatever. So we jump forward 50 years to discover…well, the same thing.

Black-on-black, or black-on-white violence is ignored since this is symptomatic of the problems all blacks face. But white-on-black…or conveniently enough, white-on-black crime (or less conveniently but more accurately, a half-Hispanic-on-black self-defense shooting) and right away it’s Emmett Till, people!. Have we learned nothing???!?!?!

Evidently not. Over the weekend, another March on Washington occurred as a mixed-race but largely hippie crowd came out not to celebrate Dr. Martin Luther King’s speech—the one about how one’s heart is more important than his skin color—but to protest that we aren’t spending enough time celebrating skin color. Why?

Hippie nostalgia. In Chicago, the school board voted to close many under-performing schools and send the students to better performing schools nearby. The hippies protested, claiming that the rampant violence in the city will expose these kids to horrible dangers as they walk through scarier neighborhoods. So the Chicago police have formed so-called safe passage areas where the kids will be assured of their safety as they move into another neighborhood. Put those same kids on a yellow school bus, and the hippies are priapistic that it’s Brown v. Board all over again.

No, of course, there have already been shootings in the safe zones. Remember, Chicago is a Democratic-run city so the whole thing is already cocked up. And in case the Czar was not clear enough in his point—the immense progress in the last 50 years on race relations is being subconsciously undone by a generation that thrived on racial chaos and quite seriously gets off on seeing it start up again.

Remember: the faster you can draw a parallel between a current event to some seminal event of the last 50 years, the faster the hippies will celebrate it.

Seriously, the sooner this generation goes away, the better for everyone.

The Czar of Muscovy

Божію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia upon the death of Boris Mikhailovich, who replaced Alexander Yaroslav Nevsky in 1263. However, in 1283, our Czar was passed over due to a clerical error and the rule of all Russia went to his second cousin Daniil (Даниил Александрович), whom Czar still resents. As a half-hearted apology, the Czar was awarded control over Muscovy, inconveniently located 5,000 miles away just outside Chicago. He now spends his time seething about this and writing about other stuff that bothers him.