Sit back for an idea that will never happen. But the Czar would suspect it would be incredibly popular, if not impossible to implement.

How about this: how about Congress adopt rules that cutesy nicknames and oppositionally opposed words be prohibited from use in the names of bills? In other words, no more Patriot Act, no more DREAM Act, no more Americans for… Acts?

Instead, make it a rule that a bill be named for what it is? That way, when the media ask a Congressperson “Do you support the Americans for Liberty Act,” he or she won’t have to say yes because a no answer sounds heartless and un-American.

Illinois then-Representative Mark Kirk voted for Cap and Trade because, he confessed later, he did not understand the bill but liked the name and thought it sounded essential. God help us if it had been named the Americans Don’t Suck Act. Who would vote that down?

Anyway, this is a simple rule, and oughta clean up a lot of bad voting simply because the Representative or Senator couldn’t remember the content of the legislation on the docket, and simply went with the name.

The Czar of Muscovy

Божію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia upon the death of Boris Mikhailovich, who replaced Alexander Yaroslav Nevsky in 1263. However, in 1283, our Czar was passed over due to a clerical error and the rule of all Russia went to his second cousin Daniil (Даниил Александрович), whom Czar still resents. As a half-hearted apology, the Czar was awarded control over Muscovy, inconveniently located 5,000 miles away just outside Chicago. He now spends his time seething about this and writing about other stuff that bothers him.