Never Know What You Might Find
Today, Muscovy is trimming the Village Christmas trees. This event is always accompanied by a craft show. The Czar does not understand craft shows: they seem to be filled with desperate, frustrated people with equal mixes of time and talent but little tolerance for risk. They are attended by their own kind. But the Czar does not judge if you are into that sort of thing.
And how many damned fleece mittens does one buy?
Anyhow, a couple of things for sale concerned him. This was one.
The Czar, however, was much more concerned about the grandmotherly type selling this at her booth:
Did the Czar miss a change in the law?

Божію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia upon the death of Boris Mikhailovich, who replaced Alexander Yaroslav Nevsky in 1263. However, in 1283, our Czar was passed over due to a clerical error and the rule of all Russia went to his second cousin Daniil (Даниил Александрович), whom Czar still resents. As a half-hearted apology, the Czar was awarded control over Muscovy, inconveniently located 5,000 miles away just outside Chicago. He now spends his time seething about this and writing about other stuff that bothers him.