Your Czarness:

While your good buddy Hosni enjoys a little rest and recuperation in Sharm el-Shaik, I thought it might be a good time for Those-Who- Dwell- in-Castle -Gormogon to use their manifest powers to tidy up a few loose ends.

It does just warm my heart to see all those happy people who, without so much as tank, let alone an air wing, have brought low a thugocracy. Turns out old ideas still hold sway, such as government ought to derive its power from the consent of the governed. Not new, just great!

First off, would you pretty please use your mind-control-ray-thinga-ma-jiggy to straighten out our government’s muddled thinking?

I am plain embarassed by some of the garbage spewed by our political class over the last couple of weeks. I am thinking particularly of our Secretary of State’s pronouncement that she considered Mubarak’s regime to be stable and he himself to be a personal friend of the family. Sheeesh…. I might also include pretty much anything uttered by Jabbering Joe Biden, but I don’t have that much time.

So in short, can you see to it that any time any reporter asks a question pertaining to events in Egypt, Sec. Clinto, VP Biden, et al must answer with a quotation from one of our founding documents?

I submit, for example, the Declaration of Independence.

Question: Sec. Clinton, what kind of government do we want to see formed? Answer: We want them to “…institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness.”

Question: But why did they want to send your good buddy Hosni packing? Answer: Well, Anderson, “…whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it….”

Question: But do you really think that these Arabs are “ready” for democracy? Answer: Well, Wolf, “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.”

See how easy it really is?

Yours from the Doublewide, JAB

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. — That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, — That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness.

The Czar of Muscovy

Божію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia upon the death of Boris Mikhailovich, who replaced Alexander Yaroslav Nevsky in 1263. However, in 1283, our Czar was passed over due to a clerical error and the rule of all Russia went to his second cousin Daniil (Даниил Александрович), whom Czar still resents. As a half-hearted apology, the Czar was awarded control over Muscovy, inconveniently located 5,000 miles away just outside Chicago. He now spends his time seething about this and writing about other stuff that bothers him.