Judges and many other professionals are enjoined by ethics regulations to strive to avoid even the mere appearance of impropriety. That is, if you’re considering doing something that’s perfectly legal, but looks bad, you should not embark on that course of action.
Would that Congress was bound by the same ethical canons as judges. In today’s Wall Street Journal, there’s an article stating several members of Congress (including ‘Puter’s on accidental senator Kirsten Gillibrand (D-NY)*) were involved in shorting U.S. stocks and bonds during the current recession. And Sen. Gillibrand’s “it was my husband, not me” excuse is lame, and a leading indicator of her lack of fitness, even for her current job as Sen. Schumer’s toadying bootlick.
Is there anything illegal about this activity? Nope. Does it reek of hypocrisy when these self-same Congressmen are engaged in lambasting Goldman Sachs for doing exactly the same thing? Yup. It also appears as if Congressmen are betting on America to fail.
It’s no wonder most Americans fundamentally distrust Congress.
*Yet another reason to distrust a politician who flipped her positions on issues ranging from abortion to gun control on being appointed to keep New York’s senate seat warm by an accidental governor.
Always right, unless he isn’t, the infallible Ghettoputer F. X. Gormogons claims to be an in-law of the Volgi, although no one really believes this.
’Puter carefully follows economic and financial trends, legal affairs, and serves as the Gormogons’ financial and legal advisor. He successfully defended us against a lawsuit from a liquor distributor worth hundreds of thousands of dollars in unpaid deliveries of bootleg shandies.
The Geep has an IQ so high it is untestable and attempts to measure it have resulted in dangerously unstable results as well as injuries to researchers. Coincidentally, he publishes intelligence tests as a side gig.
His sarcasm is so highly developed it borders on the psychic, and he is often able to insult a person even before meeting them. ’Puter enjoys hunting small game with 000 slugs and punt guns, correcting homilies in real time at Mass, and undermining unions. ’Puter likes to wear a hockey mask and carry an axe into public campgrounds, where he bursts into people’s tents and screams. As you might expect, he has been shot several times but remains completely undeterred.
He assures us that his obsessive fawning over news stories involving women teachers sleeping with young students is not Freudian in any way, although he admits something similar once happened to him. Uniquely, ’Puter is unable to speak, read, or write Russian, but he is able to sing it fluently.
Geep joined the order in the mid-1980s. He arrived at the Castle door with dozens of steamer trunks and an inarticulate hissing creature of astonishingly low intelligence he calls “Sleestak.” Ghettoputer appears to make his wishes known to Sleestak, although no one is sure whether this is the result of complex sign language, expert body posture reading, or simply beating Sleestak with a rubber mallet.
‘Puter suggests the Czar suck it.