Yeah, yeah, yeah, looking at the timestamp on this post you might notice that I’m blogging during the SOTU. But, GorT, don’t you want to listen? Don’t you want to pick apart what was said, what wasn’t said, how many times Nancy Pelosi blinked, and detail why Joe Biden’s fembot face needs to be adjusted? Nope. No interest. Much like former congressman Fred Grandy said this morning, the SOTU doesn’t mean much at all. It’s a bunch of empty words. Blah Blah Blah.
I’d like to point out something else. Apple announced it’s iPad “tablet” device. It’s an impressive piece of hardware with an amazing price point. GorT is actually considering purchasing one in March when it is expected to become available. However, to truly make the device sexy, you can reportedly add $130 to the bottom line and get 3G access via AT&T. Hmmm. Wait. Isn’t this the same company who is having trouble supporting their 3G network with the hordes of iPhone users slamming it checking on the latest update from your Gormogons? Isn’t this the same company who after months of being slammed by Verizon on their 3G coverage with a simply understood map has yet to deny it with any simply understood claim? I remain concerned that Apple is selecting a business partner for its 3G coverage who hasn’t invested and innovated as well as other companies. We’ll see how it shakes out moving forward but with a projected 2 to 5 Million new iPads with some percentage of these with 3G access, AT&T has its hands full and Apple will bear some brunt (at least in the tech-blogs) of any failures.
GorT is an eight-foot-tall robot from the 51ˢᵗ Century who routinely time-travels to steal expensive technology from the future and return it to the past for retroinvention. The profits from this pay all the Gormogons’ bills, including subsidizing this website. Some of the products he has introduced from the future include oven mitts, the Guinness widget, Oxy-Clean, and Dr. Pepper. Due to his immense cybernetic brain, GorT is able to produce a post in 0.023 seconds and research it in even less time. Only ’Puter spends less time on research. GorT speaks entirely in zeros and ones, but occasionally throws in a ڭ to annoy the Volgi. He is a massive proponent of science, technology, and energy development, and enjoys nothing more than taking the Czar’s more interesting scientific theories, going into the past, publishing them as his own, and then returning to take credit for them. He is the only Gormogon who is capable of doing math. Possessed of incredible strength, he understands the awesome responsibility that follows and only uses it to hurt people.