So, yeah, your Œc. Vol. visited the Czar’s domains yesterday, and we had a nice time, or at least so thought Confucius*. The Czar seems to have been baffled by the Volgi’s pronunciation of “Volgi,” or as the Volgi would write it, syllabified: Vol-gi. With all due regard to the Czar’s Italian or Romanian forebears who taught him that Gs followed by “i” or “e” are softened, “gi” is pronounced “gi.”

Which you’d think the Czar would get, given his leisurewear of choice. See, e.g., the cover of the invitation to his 2007 all-male “‘Boyar’ Hot Tub Is Full of Studs“ party at upper right. Confucius believes no Gormogons attended, but not having been there, he can’t personally attest to anyone’s presence. Other than Van Damme’s. That was in all the papers.

Also, so blown away was the Czar by the hard g, he seems to have forgotten my reply to his “You’re so Hollywood now.”

“Oh yeah, it’s all about the PR with the secret societies today.”

And it is. It really is.

*For those who came in late, Confucius the name of the Gormogons’ Œcumenical Volgi.

Confucius, Œc. Vol.

Don’t ask impertinent questions like that jackass Adept Lu.