Governor Jindal…

The Gormogons Posted on by

…will also have to account for this oddball story he wrote in 1994, recounting a college dorm “exorcism” (not an actual Rite of Exorcism) for which he was present. Apparently it’s come up in campaigns before and hasn’t hurt him. Certainly his record’s so impressive that if competency in administration is a criterion, he could be a human-sacrificing Druid and you’d still have to vote for him, if executive ability was your top issue.

But let not forget the top reason why he will some day be president, perhaps serving Mom’s curry-laced jambalaya in the White House. Little Piyush Jindal came home from grade school and informed his mother that he’d henceforth be known as Bobby. Where did he get this name? Bobby “Mom Said Not to Play Ball in the House” Brady.

Hail to the Chief.

The Judge

The Gormogons Posted on by


We promised Bill of Rights, so Bill of Rights it shall be. First, the Second Amendment and our Nation’s Capital.

Our ever-amusing and multi-talented civil rights abuser, the D.C. City Government has determined that no matter what the U.S. Supreme Court says, no way, no how are any law abiding citizens with the District ever going to own semiautomatic pistols. Only revolvers. And they’ll tie you up in so much red tape, you’d wish you’d never even thought of exercising your civil rights.

In a bit of irony, the majority black government of the District is imposing laws preventing its majority black populace from owning guns for self defense. Much like the racist white Jim Crow South did in order to keep blacks down. Not pretty.

I say D.C. residents should beat their government at its own game. Go out and purchase this lovely revolver, which is capable of handling both .45 ACP and .410 shot shells in the same cylinder. While not very accurate at any large distance, this weapon is more than capable of putting big holes in an intruder who, with bad intent, comes into your abode uninvited. And its at least as powerful and “scary,” if not more so, than the big, bad semiautomatic handguns the District wants to prevent you from owning.

Our Next Conservative President?

The Gormogons Posted on by



Bobby Jindal. I must admit, I’ve a bit of a man crush on Governor Jindal (R-LA). Ain’t too many of us who have accomplished as much, even in a much fuller lifetime. He may be the salvation of the conservative movement in 2012 or 2016. Even counting his odd flirtation with the snake oil salesmen who gave us “Intelligent” Design. Were he to be McCain’s V.P. candidate, his accomplishments alone would eclipse Sen. Obama’s wafer-thin resume.

And, besides, Ghettoputer’s Uncle George is a proud resident of the Pelican State.

Second on my list of potential conservative movement saviors? Adam Putnam of Florida, one of the last Florida cattlemen. More on Rep. Putnam (R-FL12) later.

There’s no such thing as Super Car

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For those not in the “know” of the Gormogonican references, there was an ad for the local (metropolitan Washington, D.C.) metrorail system where two kids beat the traffic jam using a “super car”. Aside from the need for more roads in the DC area (Hello? We’re the capital of the United States and we’re got one of the lowest road miles per capita for comparable metropolitan areas), we have this now.

“Honor” killing

The Gormogons Posted on by

Vile, of course. But puts one in mind of Gen. Sir Chas. Jas. Napier’s reported response to a delegation of Hindu worthies complaining about the British abolition of suttee.

“You say that it is your custom to burn widows. Very well. We also have a custom: when men burn a woman alive, we tie a rope around their necks and we hang them. Build your funeral pyre; beside it, my carpenters will build a gallows. You may follow your custom. And then we will follow ours.

Georgia’s a death-penalty state, isn’t it, GorT?

Baby, It’s Cold

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By now, most folks have heard of Sen. Obama’s (D-IL) opposition to the Induced Birth Infant Liability Act while a member of the Illinois Senate. This Act provided that in the event an attempted abortion failed to kill the fetus/child, and the fetus/child was then born alive, hospitals and doctors would be legally obligated to save this now extant person. Even NARAL did not actively campaign against this Act. Yet Sen. Obama determined to out-NARAL NARAL.

Regardless of one’s position on abortion, this should be a relatively uncontroversial proposition: hospitals must act to save living human beings, including babies unintentionally born alive despite the best efforts of doctors and mothers to abort them. I am unaware of any pro-choice/pro-abortion advocate that takes the position that it is acceptable to kill a born human being under these circumstances. Except, apparently, Sen. Obama.

The good Senator’s position here would seem to be extremely news worthy; that is, a presidential candidate’s belief that “aborting” a child after birth is OK. Yet, it seems, neither Katie nor Charlie nor Brian have seen fit to question His Obamaness on this extreme pro-infanticide position during their Intercontinental Obama Love Fest.

Here’s a few questions for free for Katie and her Boys, just to help them get started:

  • How long after birth do you support killing babies? One day? Two weeks? Right up until they can legally vote for you for President?
  • Since you support infanticide, do you support killing off our non-productive elderly as well?
  • If you were a tree, what kind of tree would you be?

I’d honestly have greater respect for Obama if he admitted he got paid off to vote against this legislation. Voting against this legislation shows a coldness, a calculating nature, that makes me doubt the good Senator’s humanity.

P.S. Most Americans are far, far to the right of the good Senator’s position on this issue, at least as of May 2007. (Scroll down to the “CNN/Opinion Research Corporation Poll. May 4-6, 2007” entry).

What Would Tiger Do?

The Gormogons Posted on by

Perhaps this explains why “Republicans” are having a hard time winning elections these days. It gives one pause as to what young Andrew picked up about conservatism at home from his father. (And yes, I know Andrew hasn’t spoke to his father in some time, what with Dad dumping Mom and all.)

I truly feel for Giuliani the Lesser, what with meritocracy screwing him out of his richly deserved professional golfing career. I mean, he really wanted it, and The Man won’t let him have it. It’s not fair! It seems that now lawyers believe one is a victim and is due compensation if one can’t compete on the merits.

And, kudos to Master Giuliani’s attorney, Robert Ekstrand, Esq., for somehow turning “I got cut from the team. You owe me. Put me back on the team or pay me.” into 198 pages of complaint. Genius!

In answer to the initial question posed, due to his skill and work ethic, Tiger would have never been in this position in the first place.

N.B., I base this post solely on the linked ESPN story above. Young Andrew’s complaint is not currently available online, and my take could be proven wrong. But I doubt it.

Hello! My Name Is …

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Sex Fruit! Only in the Anglosphere does this sort of nonsense happen. No one in Bangladesh or Sudan pulls this sort of stunt, mostly because they’re too busy figuring out how they’re going to eat today.

Parents should follow the wise child-naming guidance of my mother, St. Mildred of the Greater D.C. Metroplex. At a baptism once, as the parents stated the name of their child for all to hear, St. Mildred turned to me and in a disapproving stage whisper said “That’s not a saint’s name.” So, to all parents out there, for goodness’ sake, pick a saint’s name for your offspring. Something meaningful. Like Dymphna, patron saint of the insane. Plus, Dymphna’s kind of hot for a saint.

And, yes, I leave aside (for the moment) discussion of the notion that it’s acceptable for a government to have any sort of involvement in the naming of children.