The Czar wishes to offend everybody today.

Obviously, the dead of Brussels are a tragedy, and the wounded have our strongest hopes for a full recovery. The Czar does not intend to mock them, but will certainly criticize the hell out of the European mindset.

Yes, we should get right to the first item: the absurd insistence that Muslim immigrants be unquestionably welcomed into the community has made it easy, relatively speaking, for the bad guys to hide. The Czar noticed an all-too-familiar attitude among the neighbors of the Brussels terrorists: they didn’t want to say anything out of fear of stereotyping.

Of course this is a problem, but it’s also a problem if Muslims are prejudged unfairly as well. You can argue this back and forth—like we are here in the States—but ultimately this isn’t the major problem since the influx started decades ago unchecked. It’s not even in the top 5.

A bigger problem than that? Let’s start with typical European reaction. The Czar shares his contempt with many on Twitter who noticed that the largest social media reaction wasn’t over the tragedy, or what could be done to prevent the next attack, or whether something should have been done…it was over whether a French-flagged Baymax hugging a Belgian-flagged Baymax was the more heartfelt response versus the guy who Photoshopped a picture of Brussels at night with red, orange, and black colors in the skyscraper windows.

Call us mad with rage, but when you put up cute memorials of empathy all over social media by the millions, you’re basically making a commercial for ISIS. Look how many millions of people ISIS reached with a couple of simple bombs: people all over the world are providing free press and showing that they were very upset by it. Time was a local terrorist attack frightened thousands; now, it can frighten millions.

The ability of the European to roll over for people of moral depravity remains as astonishing to us now as it did thousands of years ago when Mongols raged through the East. Is any group more easily intimidated than Europeans? It’s hard to say.

Another problem is with institutionalized law enforcement cultural incompetence. To be fair, Belgium has a comparatively token force. Indeed, the Czar would not be surprised if he postulated correctly that the number of people fighting terrorism in Rhode Island exceeded the number of people fighting terrorism in all of Belgium. The Belgians literally do not have enough people—and probably won’t ever—have enough to fight all the terrorists coming into Belgium.

But other countries do, and this vexes the Czar. The Turks warned Europe that at least two of the Brussels terrorists were in central Europe—no one stopped them. Basically, as long as they were targeting Belgium, they were Belgium’s problem. It’s hard to fathom this, except to say that European unity and community is nothing more than a shrugged puff of smoke. How many countries did the terrorists visit on their way to Belgium? Who cares, seems to be the European answer. After all, if there’s one thing a European hates more than the foreigners coming to kill him, it’s the next village over and their different football club.

There’s also the issue of weapons control. Europeans love to rant about Americans and their wild west love affair for Tombstone-style shootouts and Valentines Day massacres, and how any civilized country would follow the European model of prohibition. However, whether it was the long-barrels used in Paris or the explosives used in Brussels, it seems that only people who have trouble arming themselves in Europe are the critics of American values.

Finally, and the Czar will have the most fun with this one, the Europeans seems to have two default setting choices when confronted with terror. Either they completely bow down in obedience to the most intimidating group in the room, or they become militant national socialists. Of course, our media paints this as a “disturbing rise in Right Wing hate groups,” but of course this is shorthand for a “predictable rise in Left Wing bullshit.”

As the Europeans continue to paint touching murals, hoping that the terrorists hit the next country over next time while ignoring their neighbors carrying Kalashnikovs and fertilizer into the apartment behind them, and dust off their brownshirts, the sad reality is that the terrorists picked Europe as a primary target for a bunch of reasons.

Alas, those reasons are thousands of years old.

The Czar of Muscovy

Божію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia upon the death of Boris Mikhailovich, who replaced Alexander Yaroslav Nevsky in 1263. However, in 1283, our Czar was passed over due to a clerical error and the rule of all Russia went to his second cousin Daniil (Даниил Александрович), whom Czar still resents. As a half-hearted apology, the Czar was awarded control over Muscovy, inconveniently located 5,000 miles away just outside Chicago. He now spends his time seething about this and writing about other stuff that bothers him.