Cutting It Close
For a second, the Czar got excited there when he spottted the headline “Obama Dispatches Geithner, Lew to Negotiate on Tax Cuts.”
Ah, they mean the President ordered the two on a special assignment. See, when the Czar dispatches somebody, it involves an axe and about seven cervical vertebrae.
But you have to admit, if you are going to negotiate, immediately beheading two of your own guys is a hell of an attention getter.
Божію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia upon the death of Boris Mikhailovich, who replaced Alexander Yaroslav Nevsky in 1263. However, in 1283, our Czar was passed over due to a clerical error and the rule of all Russia went to his second cousin Daniil (Даниил Александрович), whom Czar still resents. As a half-hearted apology, the Czar was awarded control over Muscovy, inconveniently located 5,000 miles away just outside Chicago. He now spends his time seething about this and writing about other stuff that bothers him.