Chicago’s Mayor Daley takes a lot of crap from all sides. But the uncomfortable fact is that he is a really good mayor by Chicago standards: although hated by many on the right, one cannot escape the fact that he has transformed the city from a decaying, under-employed collection of scary neighborhoods with pockets of culture into a world-class city with hundreds of museums and attractions, high-priced condominiums, and a technology sector second to Silicon Valley. Chicagoans have paid a price in terms of higher taxes and astronomical real estate prices, but the popular Chicago associations of Cabrini Greene and Al Capone have been replaced by Millenium Park and Michael Jordan.

But the Mayor has an obsessive compulsive weakness: he is pathologically terrified of firearms. Long-time readers of this site, and almost any other, are aware that Chicago enacted an illegal ban on firearms in 1982, which eliminated all but sporting shotguns and a precious few rifles.

And you also know that despite all claims to the contrary, the crime rate in Chicago has exceeded the national norm. In fact, it was as bad as Washington DC, which of course had its own handgun ban. Something about handgun bans in large cities seems to drive up the crime rate; perhaps you can figure out why without our help. Things are so weird in Chicago that the crime statistics are deliberately kept in a manner incompatible with the Department of Justice’s methods, so that the DoJ is unable to point out how askew they are in its annual report on violent crimes. Chicago always has an asterisk.

Lately it appears that the Supreme Court of the United States is moving toward declaring the firearm ban unconstitutional (as it is), and allowing citizens at the very least to own handguns in their own homes (concealed carry is still forbidden except for his bodyguards, aldermen, and active or retired police). Boy, that must torque Daley to know his bi-monthly tirade against firearm crimes (and subsequent demand for increased gun control) is a failure.

After all, this is the guy who sued American firearm manufacturers unsuccessfully (but enough to cause Colt to drop its civilian weapon program) and is now going after foreign manufacturers as well.

And he’s the guy who used a horrific slaying of a popular police officer as a political prop in his latest stunt by saying that, had he had his way, the punks who shot him would not have had the guns to do so (ignoring the fact that the officer’s father—a retired cop who is among the few to carry legally—shot two of the attackers dead with a handgun and saved more lives).

But not so fast. In fact, the Mayor accepts the reality that his beloved ban will be overturned: he instead will make it bureaucratically impossible for Chicago residents to own firearms. Through a combination of expensive paperwork, background checks, and training requirements, the Mayor will ensure that no one will seriously take the time to complete the entire program. Other places do it, so why not Chicago?

This is not what irks the Czar. Instead, it is the dangerously violent terror the Mayor exhibits. Two cases in the last 24 hours:

When a reporter asked the Mayor to explain exactly how his handgun ban could remotely be considered a success, the Mayor offered to shove a bayoneted rifle up the reporter’s rectum and pull the trigger. He has quasi-apologized for the comment in a fully insincere but characteristically incoherent rant. Of course, saying you apologize is not as valuable as actually doing it. He has, in fact, not apologized to the reporter in question but merely suggested he could.

Two—and far worse—the Mayor revealed another violent spasm when he said “You have to have confidence in the Supreme Court, Maybe they’ll see the light of day…Maybe one of them will have an incident and they’ll change their mind overnight, going to and from work”

Tire screech. The Mayor hopes that someone will attack a member of the SCOTUS with a firearm and convert them to being anti-gun? Maybe on their way to or from work, someone will use a handgun on a Justice? If the Czar made such a comment, he might expect a visit from people in suits.

Mayor…no one in their right mind makes comments like these. You have betrayed your illness to everyone as just that: a derangement. Maybe you will see the light of day and get treatment. In the meantime, you do not seem to be disarming your cadre of drunken aldermen and your own personal bodyguards from their dangerous weapons. How loud is your cognitive dissonance?

The Czar of Muscovy

Божію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia upon the death of Boris Mikhailovich, who replaced Alexander Yaroslav Nevsky in 1263. However, in 1283, our Czar was passed over due to a clerical error and the rule of all Russia went to his second cousin Daniil (Даниил Александрович), whom Czar still resents. As a half-hearted apology, the Czar was awarded control over Muscovy, inconveniently located 5,000 miles away just outside Chicago. He now spends his time seething about this and writing about other stuff that bothers him.