Stand By

The Imam in glorious disguise as an out-of-shape hasbeen, but he fools us not.
Most of the Gomorgons are out enjoying a long holiday weekend, and the Czar came in this afternoon to discover he was in charge. Nice, because the place was left a total mess.

That said, let us do a bit of housekeeping.

As most of you know, there is the upcoming GomorgoniCon 2009 convention. No, tickets are not yet on sale, as we are still negotiating for a venue. By negotiations, of course, we mean the brutal kind. Stay tuned for announcements on this. Once we agree to a few particulars and dispose of the bodies, we will announce ticket sales and prices.

Unfortunately, due to his ferociously busy schedule, Val Kilmer will not (repeat not) be at the convention this year. We are hopeful this does not hurt ticket sales, and are looking to line up another guest celebrity. GorTechie is pretty close to landing Bernadette Peters, while your Volgi of course is a huge Mac Davis fan. However, Ghettoputer is hopeful we can get someone who was not a regular on The Muppet Show. Do not hold your breath.

Also, to our secret member Fraktur, you left your sunglasses here. The Czar will place them in the mailbox out front if you want them this weekend; otherwise, you can pick them up on Monday.

The Czar hopes your weekend plans are good and fun and safe, and will start some tidying up around here.

About The Czar of Muscovy

Божію Поспѣшествующею Милостію Мы, Дима Грозный Императоръ и Самодержецъ Всероссiйскiй, цѣсарь Московскiй. The Czar was born in the steppes of Russia in 1267, and was cheated out of total control of all Russia by upon the death of Boris Mikhailovich, who replaced Alexander Yaroslav Nevsky in 1263. However, in 1283, our Czar was passed over due to a clerical error and the rule of all Russia went to his second cousin Daniil (Даниил Александрович), whom Czar still resents. As a half-hearted apology, the Czar was awarded control over Muscovy, inconveniently located 5,000 miles away just outside Chicago. He now spends his time seething about this and writing about other stuff that bothers him.