Do As I Say, Not As I Do
“This leadership team will create the most honest, most open, and most ethical Congress in history” – Speaker-Elect Nancy Pelosi (D-CA), Press Release, November 16, 2006
In the ever growing list of examples why this is far from the most open, most honest, most ethical Congress ever, it turns out that Nancy Pelosi’s PAC has paid her husband close to $100,000 over the last decade. She supported and voted for a bill last year that would ban this practice and the Democrats have clamored that this is part of the “culture of corruption” that exists on Capitol Hill. Pelosi’s office claims that she is only repaying her husband’s firm at a fair market value for work they’ve done supporting the PAC. Well, isn’t that convienent.
GorT is an eight-foot-tall robot from the 51ˢᵗ Century who routinely time-travels to steal expensive technology from the future and return it to the past for retroinvention. The profits from this pay all the Gormogons’ bills, including subsidizing this website. Some of the products he has introduced from the future include oven mitts, the Guinness widget, Oxy-Clean, and Dr. Pepper. Due to his immense cybernetic brain, GorT is able to produce a post in 0.023 seconds and research it in even less time. Only ’Puter spends less time on research. GorT speaks entirely in zeros and ones, but occasionally throws in a ڭ to annoy the Volgi. He is a massive proponent of science, technology, and energy development, and enjoys nothing more than taking the Czar’s more interesting scientific theories, going into the past, publishing them as his own, and then returning to take credit for them. He is the only Gormogon who is capable of doing math. Possessed of incredible strength, he understands the awesome responsibility that follows and only uses it to hurt people.